Just A Sojourner On This Planet

Friday's Feast

2007-02-03T12:08:00.000-07:00

Appetizer
What was one of the fashion fads when you were a teenager?
The outfit of the day was low boots, short skirts, a white shell and a big bulky knit sweater.

Soup
Name one thing you think people assume about you when they first meet you.
That I eat too much because I am overweight.

Salad
On a scale of 1 to 10 being the highest, how hard do you work?
10 When I work I put 100% into whatever I am doing. (BTW, it really bugs me when people say they put in 110% effort—there is no such thing!)

Main Course
If you were given a free 30-second commercial during the Super Bowl to sell anything you currently own, what would you advertise?
I have a fox stole inherited from my grandmother….I don’t believe in wearing fur and would like to be rid of it.

Dessert
Fill in the blank: I love to curl up with a good book when it is raining.

Random Thoughts Due to Lack of Sleep

2007-01-27T07:46:00.000-07:00

Why do we think our dogs would look so cute in human clothes? Why do we cut their fur and then have to put sweaters on them? Just before it got really really cold here, we took Harry and Teddy in to get a trim. What I meant when I told the groomer "just trim them--you know, even out their coats". She heard, "Take them down to 1/4 inch" I guess. Now I know, I say just a bath and trim their face and feet. Harry was shivering for a month and had to be put under a blanket every time he came in from going out to potty. Teddy is young and nothing seems to bother him!

I had a "bed of nails" night last night. That's when I only sleep for, at the most, an hour at a time. Then I lay awake for an hour or more. Last night none of my tried and true methods worked. I read--which is usually a sure-fire method to cause sleepiness. Not this night! I read for 1-1/2 hours. Finally I shut off the light and put on my instrumental hymns CD. First, it was too loud, then it was too soft. I listened to all 15 hymns and it shut off. There were dogs barking all night, it seemed. I finally fell asleep at around 5:30 and was awakened by one of the outside dogs(our neighbor's dogs that sleep at our house) shrieks. There are the mom and 2 six month old girl pups. They are now bigger than their mom and are starting to bug her. I think she bit one of the girls. That got me flying out of bed to see what the injury was. I think it was mostly hurt feelings because I couldn't find any blood. So I got up. Feel like I've been run over by a truck, but I'm up.

Got Joel Osteen's daily word in my email and it was a good one. "Be careful how you live--not as unwise but wise, making the most of every opportunity." (Ephesians 5:15-16) God gives me opportunities all the time that I pass up due to silly fears. When I worked, I never procrastinated. Now that I have time on my hands, I put things off until I end up apologising because they are late. I am realizing that because I have the idea that I have all the time in the world, I am letting many important opportunities slip right through my fingers. I need to get my priorities in order and live the best life God has for me. Take action, don't just dawdle.

I'm NEVER Dieting Again

2007-01-26T15:09:00.000-07:00

I'm not tired of being fat, I'm not giving up on losing weight, but I am sooooo DONE with dieting. Forever!

Me and two other ladies at my church decided to support each other in our efforts to lose weight. We decided to do this early last November. We brought in all our diet books--I won--I had the most. We brought in all our exercise tapes--I won--I had the most. I had been in the most diet programs too. Ha Ha - nothing very funny about being a winner in this contest, is there? There I was again, dieting! And not being successful--feeling like a failure.

One of the ladies brought in a book entitled "The Weigh Down Diet--An Inspirational Way To Lose Weight, Stay Slim and Find a New You". It's been around since 1973. I think I heard of it, but thought it was just a gimmicky idea. It may have been the only diet book I had never bought. This book told me I was NOT a failure. It told me that there are NO "Bad" foods. It told me to ask God for help. It told me to pray before I ate--every time--BEFORE I ate. It told me to stop eating diet foods. It told me to eat what I like???? How could THAT work??? It kept me reading, to say the least!

I want to say one thing before I extoll the virtues of the Weigh Down book. Our little support group has grown from the 3 of us to 9 people. I think that using this book as part of a twice a week support group is VERY important. We truly SUPPORT each other. We rely on God to support us. The book is based on biblical principals. If you google the author of this book today, you will see that she has headed off into another direction altogether. Back when she wrote this book in the early 1970's, she was right on. I don't care with she is doing today....the principals in this old book are working. They make sense and God is rewarding each one of us in the group as we draw nearer to Him thru prayer and reliance on Him for His strength, not our puny willpower!

FRIDAYS FEAST #128

2007-01-26T14:29:00.000-07:00

This picture has nothing whatsoever to do with the FF, but just reread Rob's Unspace Blogs about his birdies last night and thought that this was a cute picture--it's not one of Rob's birdies, but I thought it was cute anyway!

APPETIZER

If you could take lessons to learn any musical instrument, which would you want to learn? How about relearn? That would be the piano. When I was a kid, I took lessons for 8 years, competed and did quite well. Then turned 13 and my priorities changed--high school and all that it entails. I can still read notes, but can't play a note! Now they have those electric pianos and I would love to play again.

SOUP

Have you ever mistaken a person for someone else?

Embarrassingly, many times. So many times, that until I am absolutely sure of the person's name, I don't use their name when I address them. I practice looking at them and saying their name over and over in my mind until I have it set. Still, sometimes, I can barely catch myself before saying their name incorrectly. Some people (particularly women) get insulted if you call them by the wrong name.

SALAD

On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being highest, how well do you keep secrets?

I am a 10. I have been a confidant to many. I have an ability to tuck secrets away in a corner of my mind behind a locked door. I am the safest person to tell a secret to because I never repeat anything that was ever told to me in confidence. Once, a close friend accused me of telling something that she had wanted kept secret from the people at work. It had gotten out and she was positive that I had told someone. I had not and I was very distressed that she would think that I had let the secret out. She was angry with me and I was very hurt that she thought it was me. As it turned out, a coworker "googled" my friend's name on the internet and read about her then told everyone else at work about her secret. It affected our friendship--it will never be the same.

MAIN COURSE

What's the closest you've ever been to a dangerous animal?

Last summer, I killed a rattlesnake with a shovel. It was in the fenced patio right by the water faucet. Luckily, it rattled just as I was heading for the faucet to turn off the water. I ran back into the house, thought about it and went out the front door, got the shovel and chased it back through the fence. It kept trying to come back into the patio. That's the area where we let out 2 little dogs go to be outside. I didn't want it to come back in and bite one of the dogs. So I had to suck up my fear and make the first strike with the shovel count. My husband was out of town and my neigbors were at work--I had to do it. I cried afterward, because I don't believe in killing even dangerous animals.

DESSERT

When was the last time you lost your patience?

Last Saturday. The next day my husband and I ended up in a big fight about it. I have a difficult time trying to control my temper. It is a thorn in my side. I am just like my father in that way. I don't lose patience with other people--just myself. I let myself get frustrated and then boom! I lose it--I scream, shout, kick inaminate objects, tear things, throw things....etc. It's horrible and I feel horrible for letting it happen. I have made progress with God's help. It's just that I don't always rely on the Lord for help and trying to control it under my own strength is useless. Lord help me remember where my strength comes from!

Struggle is a Daily Thing

2006-12-04T12:47:00.000-07:00

Isn't always interesting that when I start to pray about and deal with my worst bad habit, I get confirmation from God that this is exactly what He wants me to do? I consider my control issue to be my worst BAD HABIT. I call it a habit because when I go thru daily life, I use control as my way of coping. If I don't release it every day by addressing it first thing in the morning in prayer and trusting my Heavenly Father to look after me, I pull it back into my life. A few days go by without praying about it and I find that I am using it again.

It's a bad habit, just like chewing ones fingernails or whatever (you fill in the blanks). I have found that when I let one bad habit in, some others slide right back in as well. Next thing I know, my witness is poor again. And wouldn't you know, my unsaved husband is the first one to point it out to me.

When I walk with Jesus as my shepherd and follow His path, my burdens are light and the path is easy. I have serenity. When I walk in the flesh, I am frustrated, upset, anxious and angry. Why is the way of the flesh so hard to give up then? I think on my part, it's pride. I want to be able to say, "I did this.......I accomplished this"....I want to be praised and recognized for those things I do. I know that God is the author of all good things in my life because without Him, my life is ugly and unsatisfying.

I have had such joy since I have made a renewed committment to follow the Lord's leading in all areas of my life. I am thrilled that I can hear the Holy Spirit is letting me know when I even slightly stray from the path. I am now noticing each tiny slip that leads to a slide. I can correct the slip before it becomes serious. I love following Jesus! My life gets better every day. Praise the Lord!

Here it is again

2006-12-02T10:01:00.000-07:00

And it’s all about – okay here’s that word once again – CONTROL. The classic Type A personality with people-pleasing thrown in.

I give to others as my way of exerting my control over people and situations, I resent their dependence on my giving and giving because now they expect it and the stress on me to perform is ever-increasing. But can I release that control? Maybe for a little bit of time, but it’s excrutiating to do so. Why can’t I just trust the Lord, be obedient to His Word and rest assured that He will look out for me? Why do I have to manipulate every situation so that I feel some measure of control? A posting I read today has made me think about these issues to the point that I must pray to my Heavenly Father to cause me to desire letting go of control. I need to give up this filthy habit. Every thing that I struggle with in my life rotates around the control issue. I can see that now. Time to pray!

I spent 2 hours looking a non-diet websites, blogs, Yahoo groups, etc. The support group I belong to has decided to follow a non-dieting approach to weight loss and healthy living. The idea is that for 25 years(or how ever long each of us has had an issue with food) dieting just hasn't worked. We are now set to begin eating smaller portions and only when we are hungry. We have to reprogram our way of thinking about food. No BAD foods. Eat when hungry and eat only enough to sate that hunger. That means eating an amount of food about the size of a deck of cards. How can I do this? Only with God's strength. I have no willpower(i.e. control) over food.

Jesus, today give me Your strength to endure to the end of the day. Let me rest and not struggle to retain control. Help me to pray or call someone when I get weak, let me lean on You or a friend for help. I can't do this alone--I never could.

Friday's Feast No. 120

2006-12-01T15:34:00.000-07:00

Friday's Feast No. 120

Appetizer
Have you even flown in a helicopter?
Yes I have. In the early 1970’s Peter Revson, heir to the Revlon fortune had an off-road dune buggy that he raced in the desert by Palm Springs. We followed him from above in a helicopter in case he had any trouble.

Soup
What color is your warmest coat or jacket?
It is black, cozy with fake fur and a hood.

Salad
What is your favorite rainy day activity?
Sitting in front of the fireplace reading a good book—wait a minute! I don’t have a fireplace any longer. Oh well, curling up with a good book.

Main Course
Describe your hands.
I guess you would say that I have my grandmother’s hands. They are kind of big for a woman, as I can span one key past an octave on the piano. I have long nails painted a soft pinky-beige color. I only wear my wedding ring as all my other rings were stolen when our house was burglarized last year. They are tan, because since we moved to Arizona, I have a perpetual tan on my exposed skin.

Dessert
If you could eat only one nut for the rest of your life, what nut would you pick?
I was going to say cashews but then I thought about it. I really like cashews and macadamia nuts, but get tired of both of them before I get done with the opened can. I think I’ll say peanuts instead. I like peanuts and peanut butter. I would really miss it if I had to give up peanut butter.

Busy, Busy, Busy

2006-11-27T15:24:00.000-07:00

Niagara Falls taken by Chris Sauer

I am a busy person lately. Not that I found a job. I've just been busy with church, working for the pastor, doing the church books(past and present), working on Chris Sauer's business and personal accounts, etc. Today is a very full day and the rest of the days leading up to the day my friend, Chris Sato(woman) arrives and we drive to my aunt's house in San Diego for her annual Christmas party on the 9th.

I have a new bare wood dining room set to stain and varathane. One table with leaf and six chairs with 8 rungs on the back each. I'm still not sure about the color, but have to get it done, so I'll have to pick a color and live with it. We got bare wood because I couldn't find a set I liked that was reasonably priced. I love this set and it's made of parawood. That is a fast-growing relative of the rubber tree and is highly renewable. It's as hard as oak when it has been dried. It takes stain about the same way too. I was very impressed with it. If I ever get hardwood floors they will be bamboo. Now they are making countertops and cabinets from bamboo also. If you have ever had bamboo in your yard, you know what a renewable plant it is......takes over!

Gotta go, meeting with the pastor tonight for secretary duties.

Community and Fellowship

2006-11-26T15:25:00.000-07:00

We read in Kings 19:1-21 today at church. Elijah wanted to disappear because Jezebel put a hit out on him. He thought that the Jews had given up on him and God. He gave in to fear and the offshoots of fear: hoplessness, despair and depression. He wanted to isolate himself and be alone with his self pity.

As a person who has struggled with depression all my life I totally understand this desire. But it is not God's will for my life, nor was it His will for Elijah. God got his attention with a huge wind and an earthquake. Then when he was listening, God spoke to him in a quiet voice. He told Elijah that He wanted him to go back without fear and that he was to anoint 3 people to help him. God told him that there were 7,000 who were still faithful. Doesn't fear and depression make us exaggerate how things really are?

God has designed us for fellowship and community. If we have fellowship, others can offer us sympathy, empathy and encouragement. They can compensate for "soul fatigue" and lift us out of fear, anxiety and lack of vitality. God's answer for Elijah's soul fatigue was to rest and eat, rest and eat, then get up and go on a mission that God laid out for him. He was cured by obeying and doing. We need to put feet and hands to our prayers. Galatians 6:10

Fellowship will motivate our walk with God. We must be still and listen to what the Lord wants for our lives. If we choose our own way, we often come back battered down. We KNOW when we are on God's path for our lives--it feels right.

True community is: 1. love for others John 13:35
2. interdependence Phillipians 1:27

We need one another.

Are We Clear On Our Mission?

2006-11-05T18:01:00.000-07:00

Our life needs to be in the context of God. We need to be in the fellowship of other believers--for most of us that means church, bible study groups and phone calls. We strengthen, build up, encourage and love one another. We cannot worship the Lord alone, because we are human beings. Jesus was usually in the company of His fellow humans. Except when he went to pray. Often He prayed all night long.

How long is our prayer time? Look at it this way.........

How often do we eat to sustain our earthly shell? At least 2 or 3 times a day, right? How often do we feed our spirit? If all we do as a Christian is attend Sunday service, we are not eating enough of the spiritual food we need to grow strong as Christians--how can we have enough left over to pass around to the world?

It's our mission on this earth to tell non-believers that God loves them. Remember the first time someone told you that God loves you and you believed it? How wonderful was that? Can't you put aside fear and pride long enough to say that to a non-believer? So what if they say, "Go away and leave me alone". At least you have told them. I had to be told many, many times before I believed it. Thank God the person who kept telling me never gave up.

I Changed My Mind--A Woman's Perogative, OK?

2006-11-03T12:08:00.000-07:00

Resting on God’s Promises and Grace

I moved the computer out to the living room where I can interact with my husband while he does his favorite thing—watch. Now I’m not in a distant room and I can write on my blog while I am with him. So I am going to continue with my blog after all. How blessed am I to be able to do this? I know that moving it was an inspiration of the Holy Spirit because I really did want to continue blogging. I kept reading other's blogs, but really wanted to write. Divine inspiration stepped in and gave me a solution. God answers prayer.

Faith is a choice. There is no magical moment when we are endowed with faith. We conciously choose to believe in God and His promises. We choose to believe that what the Bible says is true. With that choice and commitment comes the blessings of grace.

I read, pray and meditate (I meditate by writing, not sitting and thinking) on God's word. All of Jesus teachings and the writings of the new testament urge us to be in fellowship with other believers. “Whenever 2 or 3 are gathered in My Name, Jesus says, there I will be also.” We don’t gather at church, the group of believers ARE the church. We’re not required to go to church so much as we are gather together to uplift, challenge and encourage each other in His Name. I praise the Lord for the group of believers that I have found in Valley Baptist Church.

I have found that the more I commit to the Lord, the more uplifted I am. I lose my fears because faith and fear cannot co-exist. If I believe that God is holding me in His hands, what can I fear—Nothing!

That does not mean that I leave my home unlocked when my husband is out of town. I am not foolish. I still look where I step because I live in the rural desert and we have rattlesnakes. I wear a seatbelt when I drive. It’s just that the consuming thoughts of “what could possibly happen” do not dominate my thought processes any longer. I stay out of my head by helping others. There are always places to volunteer. The Baptist philosophy is that of missions. Not just support of foreign missions, but helping in the direct community. Giving of oneself is a good treatment for my depression. Commitment to continue serving is an important part of my anti-depressant treatment. Eating healthy and getting enough exercise—that is, being a good steward of my earthly temple helps me stay positive. Reading, radio ,movies and t.v. watching are limited to things that uplift me these days.

If you think of your brain as a computer and you input garbage……….well, you know the old saying, “Garbage in, garbage out” I wanted to clean up what came out of my mouth—well, I quit reading, watching and listening to things that had negative messages and trash talking in them. Those things quit rolling around in my thoughts so that I no longer think in a negative way—ready to make a cutting remark or snide comment. I wanted to become a person who was supportive and gracious, not just one of the guys. I wanted to be that soft place for my husband to fall, instead of someone trying to nag him into being a better man. If I am a better woman, he will be a better man.

With God’s grace, I am getting there!

I Am Moving On--Bye Bye

2006-10-21T12:00:00.000-07:00

"He (God) touches the mountains and they smoke"

My blog has served me well. Through reading other Christian women's and men's blogs over the last year and writing many of my own, I have been lifted and moved forward by God.

My despair and depression about several things has been removed through your prayers and mine. I still don't have a paying job, but I have the Lord's work. I am not only the secretary to the pastor of my church, but now the assistant treasurer. I am working on the books. I have fellowship and friends. I am getting to know everyone in my church and have a circle of women friends.

After prayer and listening to the Lord, I am ready to move on. I think I will save the record of my progress on my computer as I wrote the various postings on this blog. I appreciate everyone who commented and uplifted me in word and prayers.

I am going to continue to read blogs and comment on them, but I won't be writing any longer.

Halleluia--Grace like rain. I am living proof that prayer changes lives!

Long Time, No Post

2006-10-01T16:47:00.000-07:00

This is yesterday's picture of my nephew and his son, who is just over 6 months old.

I just had to post this picture of father and son.

I haven't posted in a long time because I have been very busy with home and church.

The entertainment center that was whitewashed oak was quite a project. We didn't realize how hard it is to strip whitewash out of all the grain in oak. We're talkin' toothbrushing every single grain, dipping and wiping, garbed in goggles, gloves and breather mask. This took a daily committment from dawn until it got to hot in the garage to work. (usually to about 12:30). The rest of the day was too unbelievably hot to even think about using the volitile stripper liquid.

Then came the sanding, staining, and varathane. Sanding in between the coats of varathane(water-based varnish). We finally finished it a week ago Thursday. We brought it in the house and Phil & I put it together. Then on Friday, my son and mother arrived. My son did all the DirecTV moving and hooking up. Friday night, we watched, Master and Commander on wide-screen tv with surround sound. (we've had the surround sound for many years, but this is the first time we've really been able to enjoy it with a movie)

I love my church and I am there several times a week. I go to ladies bible study and discipleship bible study. I work at the church too, once a week. I still haven't found a job, but my life is joyous once again. The Lord has lifted the depression.

Thank you Lord for my life!

I Am Falling In Love With My Church and It's People

2006-09-10T15:14:00.000-07:00

I have never felt this way about a church before. I have always had a relationship with Jesus, but have never had fellowship like this. The people welcomed me with open arms. They say hello to me by name.........by name, this is a new thing. I've been a member of 2 big churches in Orange County and been anonymous except in the smaller bible studies groups or evening classroom studies. I did attend a smaller church right after we moved to Arizona but was ignored by all except by the person who brought me.

I chose Valley Baptist church out of the local church directory in the newspaper. I was fearful to go to a new church for the first time, but the Lord helped me push my fears aside. I was welcomed and said hello to by several friendly people. It's a small church, just about 100 people on a packed-in Sunday--it's been less this summer, due to people being on vacations.

I have been going since July, but last Sunday I officially joined the church. I go to the Sunday bible study with church services afterward. I go to the Wednesday evening bible study and the Thursday ladies luncheon bible study. This is a good way to get to know people who have the same morals and values as myself. When I walked into this church for the first time, it felt like home. What a marvelous feeling!

The pastor works full-time at a secular job at an IT Manager. He also does church counseling at another church and still manages to deliver a meaningful sermon on Sunday and facilitate the Thursday bible study. I respect him and admire his love of God and how much he cares for the congregation. His wife, Linda is a wonderful woman, humble and caring. She opens her home for the ladies Thursday bible study and provides iced tea and snacks for us. We usually stay for several hours and she is a courteous and caring hostess.

As I get to know more people, I am getting more joyful. Since my friend, Julie, died last December, without realizing it, I had pulled back from people. I felt isolated out here in the middle of nowhere. Going to this church, I have met lots of people who live in Tonopah. They are an independent bunch. They like living in the wide open spaces, but are friendly when you get to know them.

Oh and yesterday, thanks to my husband, we finally met some of the neighbors. Two sisters who both work, so we don't have much of an opportunity to socialize, but I intend to invite them to dinner soon. They are close friends with some other neighbors, so we will maybe meet them too.

Things are going great, since I have begun to engage in life. Praise the Lord for bringing me along at my own pace, setting aside my fears and giving me fellowship. Today is a day of JOY!

Saturday is not a day off!

2006-09-09T17:59:00.000-07:00

Working, working, working........

We had to do the rest of the snake fence (1/4" mesh, 4 ft high) on the other side of the patio. Since we were doing that, we decided to move the lattice fence about 10 feet closer, giving the dogs a smaller area to go potty, but giving the lizards and birds full access to the stunned bugs that fall from the bug zapper. It is now outside of the fenced area.

We had just finished getting the mesh installed over the 13 feet of fence, when big clouds snuck up on us and wrung themselves out. We had a deluge for about 20 minutes. I was on the outside of the fence, so I had to run all the way around the patio on the outside and then back in. I was as wet as you would get by jumping fully clothed into a swimming pool!

When it finished soaking the dry desert....Oh I'm not complaining about the rain, we needed it. We went back out and put the lattice back up on the fence. That's what you do here, wait it out and keep on working!

It's dinner time already, so have to go and feed the dogs. Then cook the spagetti noodles and heat up the sauce that I made the other day. Make a salad and we will be eating too.

I've got sore muscles cause we moved a bunch of castle blocks that we had lining the edges of the patio. Look up castle blocks at Home Depot if you don't know what they are. Those things are heavy!

Praising the Lord for a beautiful day, beautiful rain and the sense of accomplishment at a job well done.

Factoids Just for Fun!

2006-09-04T12:50:00.000-07:00

In the 1400's a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have "the rule of thumb"
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Many years ago in Scotland , a new game was invented. It was ruled "Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden"...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.
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The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone.
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Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U. S. Treasury.
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Men can read smaller print than women can; women can hear better.
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Coca-Cola was originally green.
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It is impossible to lick your elbow.
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The State with the highest percentage of people who walk to work: Alaska
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The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28% (now get this...)
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%
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The cost of raising a medium-size dog to the age of eleven: $6,400
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The average number of people airborne over the U.S. In any given hour: 61,000
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Intelligent people have more zinc and copper in their hair.
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The first novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.
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The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile National Monuments.
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Each king in a deck of playing cards represents a great king from history:
Spades - King David
Hearts - Charlemagne
Clubs -Alexander, the Great
Diamonds - Julius Caesar
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111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
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If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
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Only two people signed the Declaration of Independence on July 4th, John Hancock and Charles Thomson. Most of the rest signed on August 2, but the last signature wasn't added until 5 years later.
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Q. Half of all Americans live within 50 miles of what?
A. Their birthplace
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Q. Most boat owners name their boats. What is the most popular boat name requested ?
A. Obsession
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Q. If you were to spell out numbers, how far would you have to go until you would find the letter "A"?
A. One thousand
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Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.
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Q. What is the only food that doesn't spoil?
A. Honey
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Q. Which day are there more collect calls than any other day of the year?
A. Father's Day
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In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulle d on the ropes the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase......... "goodnight, sleep tight."
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It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and because their calendar was lunar based, this period was called the honey month, which we know today as the honeymoon.
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In English pubs, ale is ordered by pints and quarts... So in old England , when customers got unruly, the bartender would yell at them "Mind your pints and quarts, and settle down." It's where we get the phrase "mind your P's and Q's"
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Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. "Wet your whistle" is the phrase inspired by this practice.
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~~~~~~~~~~~ AND FINALLY~~~~~~~~~~~~
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At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!
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Try and read this even though it looks weird. Believe it or not, you can read it.
I cdnuolt blveiee that I cluod aulaclty Uesdnatnrd what I was rdanieg. The Phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in what oredr the Ltteers in a word are, the olny iprmoatnt tihn g is that the first and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.
Amzanig huh?
-----------------------------------
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2006 when...
1. You accidentally enter your PIN on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on televi sion has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't even have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list.
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.

I Live Here

2006-09-03T21:08:00.000-07:00

This isn't the best picture of the house, because I haven't taken any. This was taken to document the concrete that we had put in. But what I have to say isn't about a house or garage or concrete.

See, here's how it is. I live here. Up until today, in my mind, I didn't live here, I was only staying here until we moved back to where I had lived my whole life before we came to southwest Arizona. Even though Phil and I have lived here for 1 year and 3 months, I realized just today that I didn't consider this my home. It was a house that we were living in.

I hadn't really made any friends locally. Oh, a couple of acquaintances, but no one to do things with, to call up and just have a friendly chat. I didn't want anyone like that, because I didn't really live here. Maybe we would move back to Orange County or maybe we would move near my Mom in Yucca Valley, but this place in Arizona--it was only temporary. Up until July, I hadn't really found a church. I watched church on television. I figured that was enough.

About that same time, my friend and I began praying earnestly to know God's will for our lives and to read, pray and obey His word. I picked a local church out of the church listings in my local paper and went there. From the first time, it felt like a home church to me. The people were friendly and welcoming. After attending several Sunday services, and then 2 weeks ago, starting at the Women's bible study, last week going to the Wed night bible study, I decided to make a commitment and join the church. At the altar call, I went up and told the pastor that I would like to be a member of this church. He prayed with me and then introduced me to the congregation. They all clapped and came up after service to welcome me into the family.

After service, when I came home, I finally realized that what has been missing in my life here is commitment. That's why I've been so temporary-feeling. That's why I've been unhappy. I was pretending that this life I've been living for the past year & three months was only temporary and we'd be leaving soon.

I didn't even know when I was praying to know God's will for my life that this was what I was praying for. I live here. I have a church family here. My husband is here and I am by his side. This is my home.

Thursday Thirteen--I know I'm late!

2006-09-02T19:56:00.000-07:00

Carol at She Lives http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/ got me thinking about why we don’t eat out very often any longer. It might make me sound like a food snob, but the food in the greater west valley area of Phoenix just isn’t as good as the food in Orange County California where we came from. I can’t come up with 13 good places to eat here. I can’t even come up with 5……so I thought I’d list the 13 places that we thought were awful!

1.Friends of ours had been raving about this Chinese buffet(unnamed for good reason) in Mesa for 6 months before they took us there. The food was lousy and the restaurant was dirty—I could hardly find anything to eat that didn’t make me want to gag. Don’t people notice when restaurants are grubby?

2.Mexican restaurant where our friend’s daughter had worked for 10 years. The food was passable, but very greasy—not that I don’t like greasy Mexican food, but with my cholesterol problem, the guilt was overwhelming.

3.A new Chinese buffet in Avondale called Bamboo Palace. The food was excellent at first, but has gone downhill. Some of the food is not hot now, and we all know how dangerous food can be if it isn’t kept hot enough! Danger of food poisoning. They’ve also cheaped out on many of their dishes, so they are not good any longer.

4.Another new Chinese buffet in Buckeye right by the grocery store we go to. Don’t remember the name. We waited in anticipation for it to open, because it was a lot closer to home. My husband and I love Chinese food. It finally opened, we waited a couple more weeks for the crowds to thin out and guess what? It was awful! You know how good real Chinese food tastes? Well this tasted like the poor leftovers that had been kept in the fridge for days and reheated.

5.Chili’s is one of my least favorite places, but the one we went to in Goodyear was really awful.

6.Cracker Barrel in Goodyear. Home cooking? No way, I don’t cook this crap. It was greasy, tasteless and over-breaded and salted.

7.In N Out Burger in Avondale—the only good In N Out is in Corona California—I haven’t found one anywhere that can beat it!

8.Subway, at least the one we tried after seeing a commercial for their Tuscan Chicken sandwich advertised on TV, was hideous. On a foot long, I got 4 tiny pieces of chicken breast and the “roasted vegetables” were 3 or 4 slimy overcooked pieces of bell pepper. The bread was like—I don’t know how to describe it—puffed up and dried out. A complete waste of money. I moved everything to one spot on the sandwich and threw the rest away.

9.Don’t ever go to the Olive Garden and think you are going to get good Italian food, or to the Red Lobster to get good seafood. One visit to each of those resulted in a vow never to step foot in them again. Both of those places serve food that tastes like TV dinners at best. I like Macaroni Grill (aka Carrabba’s Italian Grill) for Italian and several places near the ocean for seafood. I will say that I did get a good piece of wild caught Coho Salmon from the Fry’s fish counter last week. I poached it and it was good hot as well as chilled the next day.

10. I never, never eat at Denny’s. Even though the food is not very expensive, it isn’t worth ten cents. Really, I’m not a food snob, I’m just careful with my food dollars and I know what I like. I’ll try someplace once, but if the food isn’t good, I’ll never go again.

11. I will rarely eat at Applebee’s. I learned the hard way that I must remember it is a coffee shop, not a fine dining establishment. Regardless of how good those specials look that they advertise on TV, don’t believe it. Stick to burgers, sandwiches and salads if it’s the only place in town to eat.

12. Fast food joints with drive-thrus are on my hit-list. McDonalds always gives me heartburn, but it’s a safe place to stop and go to the bathroom when you are traveling. Wendy’s—love their chili—hate everything else. At Arby’s never eat the roast beef (pieces/parts molded into something they thin slice—ick)! But their market sandwiches are quite good, with lettuce, tomato and fresh bread. If I’m gonna spend money, I’d rather wait and go to Baja Fresh, their food truly is Fresh and delicious and low-fat too!

13. No one should eat at truck stops. Truckers have the worst taste in food. Most of them smoke, so their taste buds are deadened. So they like the over-salted, over cooked, greasy spoon food. I travel from AZ to CA to visit my mother and am never tempted to stop. I bring my own snacks for the 4.5 hour drive.

An Answer to Prayer

2006-08-27T17:22:00.000-07:00

(Picture courtesy of the monsoon season in southwest Arizona)

Good things have been happening. I went to our church's ladies bible study last Thursday. A great welcome was held out to me. After one time there, I feel a part of the group. I have been longing for this fellowship. Why I hesitated to go, was only my own fear. Now I see those fears were absolutely unfounded. The ladies are as warm as our weather, kind and fun. It was held at the Pastor's house with his wife as the leader.

During the course of the study, as we diverged into what she calls, one of the"rabbit trails"(getting off the subject), I heard that the Pastor needed a secretary to help him get organized and set up a few new ideas in motion, etc, etc. I went home a prayed about it. I got my answer during Sunday morning bible study before church service. It came to me clearly that I should offer my services. So before service, I pulled her aside and offered to do it. She said to come speak to the Pastor after services. I did. He has a lot of interesting things that he wants to do. Since I am an accountant, I will also be helping with setting up the church's accounting program. I will be helping with flyers and the bulletin.

I am excited to finally be doing something to use my skills. They offered to pay me $10/hr for 5 hours a week. Instead, I am going to donate the time. This is a teeny church. The people who go here are not rich. And of all things that could happen, about a month ago, they were broken into and anything of value was stolen. Our Pastor works full-time as a computer information technology person for a company in the Phoenix area. How could I take money from them? I love this church. The Pastor and his wife love Jesus and they are trying to spread God's word and work. I believe that this is the place for me to be at this time in my life and I believe that God led me to this place as a church family.

God has answered my prayers in His way. I needed fellowship and the Lord provided the best kind. Worship, bible study and work--all in fellowship with Christians. What more could I ask?
Well, let me tell you the other part. After I left the Pastor, I said hello and introduced myself to one of two ladies standing in the sanctuary as I was leaving. She already knew that I was going to be the Pastor's secretary. She and I conversed a while and she offered me work with the elections board. They don't pay much, but it will be interesting work. I'll get to work during all the elections, local, state and U.S. How about that?

I am thrilled to recognize an answer to prayer. It's been 1 year and 3 months since I have had a job. I send out resumes every few days. I subscribe to several city's job postings and check the newspapers for jobs constantly. It's just that until the last few months, I was still holding on to the old attitude toward work. If I had started work in any old office, I probably would have been up to my old habits before long. I am a recovering workaholic, you see. I like being at work more than anything, because I do work better than I do anything else. (relationships & keeping house, for example). When my prayer partner got the job she had been wanting a few weeks ago, I found it hard not be be envious and think, "Yeah, but what about me, God? Haven't I been praying longer than her?" Instead, I prayed and laid my disappointment at Jesus feet. He lifted me up and I could be happy for my friend's success.

God knows what I need and after many months of prayer with my prayer partner, I have gotten my attitude adjusted. Lessons I have learned: Obedience to the Lord's leading, listening instead of talking, studying to know God better, gratitude for Jesus our Savior, praising instead of complaining, and giving of myself to forget about myself.

Praise the Lord for answered prayer. And this is just the beginning................

Friday’s Feast One Hundred & Eight

2006-08-26T15:53:00.000-07:00

From Susan at www.fridaysfeast.blogspot.com

Appetizer
If you could have a free subscription to any magazine, which one would you like to have?
Martha Stewart Living. I like her decorating ideas, recipes and the pictures in the magazine are gorgeous.

Soup
Describe your living room (furnishings, colors, etc.).
It’s what they call a great room. Kitchen, dining room and living room all flow together. We are in transition right now. Changing from antiques to more modern stuff. We have a matching horsehair sofa and chair in a deep green with accent pillows made of antique drapery fabric. A settee that is wood with a damask pale salmon & off white fabric seat and back panels, a 6-foot antique dark walnut display cabinet with curved glass that holds inherited crystal and English bone china teacups. Our coffee table is made out of my grandmother’s oak kitchen table with the legs cut down. It has a large silver tray on it with a tea service that is Royal Doulton Old Country Roses pattern. There’s an antique silver-veined mirror above the couch and a hand-painted large fan on the display cabinet. We are going to be selling the couch and chair and putting the settee in another room soon. We will be using the family room furniture(also dark green—but made of ultrasuede). We have 2 oak cabinets 7 ft. tall by 4 ft. wide that we will be using on either side of our entertainment center(once we refinish it to the same color). We have had the antique furniture for 25 years and it’s time for a change.

Salad
What does the shape of a circle make you think of?
The sun, the moon and my wedding ring.

Main Course
Name 3 things in your life that you consider to be absolute necessities.
My Bible, electricity(having had to deal with several blackouts this monsoon season), and friends.

Dessert
What was the last really funny movie you watched?
You’ve Got Mail

Who We Pray For

2006-08-22T10:19:00.000-07:00

This is a picture of our friend and his 11-year old daughter. I don't have a current picture of his 13-year old son. He's the one that lost his wife last December 2nd. It's nice to see them smiling.

On Sunday, during bible study, our leader asked us to write down who we pray for every day. Until I did that, I didn't realize that I hadn't been praying for this family any more. And they definitely need prayer.

He was brought up to believe in nothing. He is very self-reliant and outwardly doesn't seem to be affected by the loss of his wife. Well, in some instances, like disciplining the children. He tends to get angry and show it when the kids frustrate him. Julie used to handle everything for the kids. Now he tries to be everything to them. I know they miss her, because they don't smile very often. There isn't anything Phil and I can do to cheer them up, it seems. If anyone could do it, Phil could. He's the world's best cheerer-upper. The son, Austin, likes talking to Phil a lot and they talk about all kinds of things. But neither of us can get thru to the daughter, Haley.

She only seems to cheer up slightly when we are shopping. She constantly wants us to buy her things. Not little things, big, expensive things. We can't afford it, so we don't go shopping with her very often. She focuses on "things" as a means of escape. But as we all know, getting something new only raises your spirits temporarily. Their dad will not let me take them to church with me, as he says, when they get old enough to take themselves to church, they can go if they want to. He doesn't believe in psychiatry either, so they have never gone to counselling after the death of their wife/mother.

So my only recourse to intercede for them is prayer.

Lord, today I pray for this family. Take care of them, help them to find their way to you. Look after the spiritual, mental and emotional well-being of the kids especially. I pledge today, Lord, to keep them in my prayers daily.

Friday 8/19 Feast

2006-08-18T14:38:00.000-07:00

Hosted by: Susan at this website http://fridaysfeast.blogspot.com/
(Can't get blogger to post the picture for some reason)

APPETIZER
What color is your car?
It's a metallic dark slate gray

SOUP
If you could wake up tomorrow with a full training in another occupation and a job in that field, what would it be?
A chef of a 4-star restaurant

SALAD
How many times in your life have you had the flu(or something similar)?
I always caught the flu every year. Once I was able to get flu shots from the time they came out with them and then in 2005, there wasn't enough vaccine to go around, so I caught it and was sick about 2 weeks. Couldn't get a shot once again in 2006 and managed to avoid it for many months, then came down with it last March.

MAIN COURSE
What is something that has happened to you this week that you didn't expect?
We were having several tons of dirt trucked in to our backyard, as it is a low area. On the second load of dirt, the hauler got stuck in our soil--moondust, remember. He wasn't driving fast enough and the belly dump let the dirt out too fast and he got high-centered on the dirt. This was at 4:00pm--the hottest part of our day in Arizona. The truck driver, my husband and I spent an hour and ten minutes digging it out in about 106 degree weather. Never expected to be doing that!

DESSERT
How old were you when you had your first kiss?
The standard age for the era that I grew up--16 years old.

Saturday Photo Hunt--Theme: Funny

2006-08-12T11:27:00.000-07:00

We had just cleared the table from Christmas dinner, when Harry, the Shih Tzu hopped up on the chair and sat down, prepared to be served.

Met a New Blogger Today

2006-08-12T10:55:00.000-07:00

I love blogging because of the infinite variety of people who post; each one giving me exposure to new things to ponder and wonder. This picture came from Rob's blog at www.unspace.net I went to his blog because he made a comment on my Friday Feast posting.

The pictures on his blog are beautiful excerpts from nature, most in his own backyard. I spent about an hour there, reading and viewing. The most fun I had was reading about his and Nancy's birds.

I have always been fascinated by birds as pets(family members) and have known and loved friend's birds. 40 years ago, I worked with Ed Fullmer--he and his wife and kids kept Macaws. Their 4 macaws had the run of the house and were magnificent. My manacurist has a yellow-head named Coco who will talk your ear off and maybe bite it too! My husband and I used to visit a pet store just so I could be with the birds. I fell in love with a big male sulfur-crested cockatoo. We couldn't afford him, as he was $15,000, but as long as we lived in California, I would go visit him at least once a week. We don't have any birds, because we have 3 small house dogs and while I am sure that we could have a bird, I don't think we should have a bird. I know that birds need a lot of attention and interaction. With 3 dogs, I have a hard enough time just giving them enough attention.

Anyway, back to Rob's blog--he is a talented writer and I really enjoyed reading his posts. If you have a chance, stop by his blog for a great read on many subjects.

5 Ingredient Friday

2006-08-11T12:25:00.000-07:00

Our Host: http://overwhelmedwithjoy.blogspot.com/

armesan or 4 Cheese Crusted Chicken Breasts

4 Chicken breasts, flattened (or not--your preference)
1 Cup grated parmesan or the Italian 4 cheese blend(you can buy pre-grated)
1/2 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1 tablespoon freshly ground pepper(or to taste)
Best Foods Mayonnaise to coat one side of the chicken

Preheat oven to 400 degrees or barbeque to high. Mix nutmeg and pepper in with cheese so it's evenly distributed. Dry chicken breasts pieces. Spray baking pan or barbeque pan with cooking spray. Smear mayonnaise on top side of chicken breast. Sprinkle each breast with 1/4 of cheese. Press the cheese into the mayo slightly. Cook 15-25 minutes depending on the thickness of the meat. Cheese should be golden and crispy. Best served with buttered spaghetti that has fresh chopped tomatoes, garlic and basil tossed in.

A couple of notes. If you grate the parmesan, use the small side of the grater, not the usual side that makes a powder. If you can't find the Italian 4 cheese blend in your store, you can make it yourself by grating together equal parts: parmesan, asiago, provolone(aged hard) and romano cheeses.

I've served this many times to small groups or large parties. Everyone loves it (if they like chicken) and it looks very gourmet.

Friday's Feast 106

2006-08-11T10:42:00.000-07:00

http://fridaysfeast.blogspot.com/

Appetizer
Tell about a toy you remember from your childhood. One Christmas when my sister and I were small, we each received a plush teddy bear that had a music box in it which played Brahm's Lullaby. I have loved music boxes ever since.
Soup
If you could make one thing in the world absolutely free for everyone, what would it be? I'll bet a lot of us say this one......a bible in the person's own language.
Salad
Approximately how many times a day do you think about your significant other? I think of him several times an hour. Although we are currently both home all the time--he is retired and I am between jobs, he likes to spend a lot of time in "his" garage working on projects and I am in the house, working on my various cleaning, cooking, sewing, blogging projects. I can sometimes hear him banging, welding or sawing and I think of him and wonder what he's working on.
Main Course
What is something you believe in 100%? That I am washed clean of sin and saved by the blood of Jesus. That because of His death and resurrection, I am a child of God. That I will be caught up in the air to meet Him when He returns for His people. That He is the Shepherd and I am a lamb in His flock. That the Holy Spirit gives me guidance and the strength to carry it through. That prayer really does change things. That I have a personal relationship with God and by reading His word, the Bible, I can know Him and live a joyful, forgiven life.
Dessert
Name one thing you have done this week that you would consider a "good deed" I'm helping our friend, Chris, get his business started, as I have a long history of business/accounting experience. His 38-year-old wife died suddenly last December and both my husband and I do everything we can to be a support to him.

The Tooth Saga

2006-08-09T20:23:00.000-07:00

Here's the story of my day today. Well, first let me start with what happened on Sunday. Well, let me give a little background. After each meal, I floss. For years, when I was younger, every time I went to the dentist for a cleaning, the hygenist would urge me to floss. I would floss for the first few days and then quit. I hated twirling my fingers around that "string" and shoving both hands in my mouth.

Finally, they came out with those individual flossing things, the dentist called them sword flossers, cause there was a toothpick end and a floss end and it looked like a buccaneer's sword. I loved them. They worked great.......I got addicted to them. I carry 10 or 20 in my purse. There's a package in both bathrooms and beside my chair where I watch tv or read. I use them every time I eat.....anything. I really am addicted to them--but it's a good addiction!

Back to Sunday. So after dinner, I was flossing. It seemed like I had some sand in my mouth and I thought, "Now where did that come from?" Then I felt my lower last molar--part of the filling had broken off. Oh great! I haven't found a dentist in our new community(well.......not so new, we've been here a year, already). I went to my former dentist for 40 years--I'm not exaggerating, I first went to him when I was 19 and now I am......do the math. I just didn't know how to pick a dentist, so I kept putting it off. When my filling kept crumbling more and more I called mom and asked her for her dentist's name and number, cause I knew she just loved him. I was going to drive 200 miles to go to a dentist that I knew I would like. I got an appointment for next Tuesday, the 15th.

The filling kept crumbling and food kept getting stuck there and I kept flossing and finally today, the whole front of the filling came out. The interior of my tooth was exposed and I knew I just couldn't wait any longer to see a dentist. So I called West Coast Dental Clinic. They said they could take me as soon as I could get there and they would squeeze me in. They did and now I have a brand new filling. That's the good news.

The bad news is, I have 2 more fillings that have to be replaced. I am a teeth grinder & clencher when I sleep. I have worn a night guard on my teeth since I was 19, but I also clench my teeth during the day. I also eat ice compulsively. I love foods that are very hard and very crunchy--you know, like Cornnuts, hard french bread, Jordan almonds, etc. But most of all I love ice. I love a big glass of ice water and once the water is gone, there's my favorite thing, the ice. I buy ice by the 20 pound sack causeI don't like icemaker ice. Yecch. I want the clear, hard stuff.

I was informed by this dentist today that I have fractures in most of my teeth and I must immediately and forever stop chewing on ice and all other hard and crunchy foods. That was quite a paradigm shift for me. My teeth have always been strong. I guess when you get older, even your teeth age. This will be a new eating challenge, for sure. Lord willing and hopefully with His strength, I can change my eating habits.

What We've Been Up To

2006-08-08T12:51:00.000-07:00

In spite of the heat, we have been working on our yard. We got a deal on our concrete because we dug it out ourselves. That driveway is 40 feet wide and 25 feet long. The walkway is 38 feet by 4 feet.

Then, we went to our friends and picked up boulders to line the driveway. We just finished putting those down today. Tomorrow we will go get as many more as the truck will hold because we are using them also to form a dry creek bed which will be 100 feet long and about 5 feet wide. So sorry I don't visit or write on blogs lately, but my arms feel like they are gonna fall off once we stop work for the day.

I have been experiencing a closer walk with the Lord due to the prayers that Marlene and I pray often as we link up over our cellphones a few times a week. Now I have been experiencing daily direction from the Holy Spirit in that still small voice of God. I am having some measure of success in controlling my tongue, both in volume and demeanor, praise God.

At Mom's House and other thoughts

2006-07-30T08:14:00.000-07:00

I've been at my mother's house since Thursday, which was her 84th birthday. The Tuesday before, she went to the doctor and he told her she's going strong. Of course, she didn't mention that she's been down in the dumps. She just told him she's been so tired lately and he didn't pursue what could have been the cause.

Mom has lost a lot of people in her life in the last 8 years, starting with my father, from an accident with gasoline. Next was my father's 2 brothers, Uncle Leo and Uncle Dick. Earlier this year, her older brother--who she was quite close to, Uncle Dale passed away suddenly. Well, not unexpectedly, as he had had 2 heart operations and the last one was past the date of life expectancy. But it was sudden, since he was at the hospital cafeteria after Aunt Norine had finished her checkup and he just dropped his head back and was gone. Uncle Fred died earlier this month, and that brought back all of the sorrow and grieving which was never finished from the other deaths. The reason I'm writing this is because the litany of all the people in her life who have passed away is what we talk about when we are alone.

Grief can affect us each differently. I grieve out loud, in front of anyone who happens to be there and with lots of tears. Others won't even cry in front of anyone. How they can hold it in, is beyond me. I feel like it just explodes out of me. My emotions are on the surface, others have theirs under control. In fact, I am learning not to control my emotions, but rather to lay my feelings at the feet of Jesus. Because, sometimes, I can be overly emotional and say and do things that I ought not to say and do. That is why the Lord has brought to my attention my manner of speaking, both in word and tone.

It seems to me that the more I pray for guidance and enlightenment so that I may walk more closesly with God, He reveals more of my shortcomings to me. Each day, there is more to work on, more to surrender, and I am more aware of how disobedient I have been, how selfish, how rude, how unkind. You have to be aware of your character flaws before you can work on them, so I praise the Lord for all He has revealed to me. Bring it on, Lord, mold me, shape me, prune me and make me the person I can be through your lovingkindness!

Another Answer

2006-07-26T08:28:00.000-07:00

I have posted that I get depressed and despairing. That I am a negative personality and struggle to stay positive. Joel Osteen's Daily word today in my email was my reply from my Heavenly Father to the posts I've written about this, in the text of the message it said,

"The enemy's goal is to steal your hope. He wants to get you down and discouraged so you will give up and settle for less than God's best. Don't be deceived! No matter how many disappointments you've encountered, God can turn things around for you in a split second of time! One touch of His favor can suddenly restore relationships! One touch of His goodness can solve that problem you're facing today! Just one touch from Almighty God can instantly change your life!"

Just last night at 8:30, when I got home from helping our friend work on a business plan and get set up on computer, I made some comments. After I finished talking, my husband said to me, "Can't you ever come home and say something happy? You always have something to bitch and complain about! It's pretty hard to listen to." I know I would not like it if he did that all the time. It's so hard to stop doing it. I want to, but the words have flown out of my mouth before I know it. I am going to have to spend some time when I drive home praying and praising God so that when I come in the door, I have a grateful, satisfied, gracious attitude.

We had a huge storm that hit us last night just as I arrived home. There was lightning, thunder, high winds and finally rain. I don't have to water the plants this morning--Yay! The storm was a little scary because I had to walk fromt the garage to the house in all that lightning. Just the night before, the news had done a segment about lightning strikes and so I was very aware what could happen being out in the open during a storm. In our county, the garage must be 25 feet away from the house--some wierd Maricopa county building code for garages that are put up after the home is already on the property. By the time I got into the house, I was sand-blasted, my eyes, mouth, nose and hair full of dirt. As we closed the door on the north side of the house, the wind hit with such a ferocity that the door sounded like it was being hit with buckshot. I was sure that all the plants would be gone or beat so badly they would die. Everything is still there, amazingly. A little worse for wear, but still there. Praise God for that. It all looks fresh and clean and best of all, no dust.

The Book Fish!

2006-07-24T17:27:00.000-07:00

When Carol at "She Lives" mentioned Pike Place Market, it brought to mind all the times I've gone there while visiting my friend who lives in Olympia. My next thought was of the fish market inside where they toss the fish through the air. Then I remembered reading the book called, "FISH". The goal of the FISH Philosophy is to learn how to boost morale and improve operational results in a business organization. As the authors put it "Enclosed are the keys to creating an innovative and accountable work/home environment where a playful, attentive, and engaging attitude leads to more energy, enthusiasm, productivity, and creativity." It can work at home too. BTW, I'm not saying it replaces reading the Bible or other inspirational reading.......

It's just that I am not a naturally positive and happy person. In my natural state, I tend toward the negative and gloomy side. I work very hard to stay positive. Sometimes I need reminders and some simple steps to "keep my sunny side up"!!!

The four key points of the philosophy are:

Play - have fun and create energy at home or at the office.

Make their day - how can you engage fellow employees, customers, family members and make each other's day?

Be Present - How can you make sure you are fully available and aware during conversations with people? It is about create a greater sense of intimacy between individuals.

Choose Your Attitude - Each day you choose how you are going to act or which "side of the bed" you wake up on. The choice is yours and, the way you act, affects others. How about the attitude of Gratitude to God for all we have?

The book is able to illustrate one point extremely effectively. It shows how attitudes can impact a setting and how many of us don't understand how our attitude impacts our work setting and quality of life. It's also hard to put into practice. I'm usually good for a week or two, then a series of "Job"-like (pronounced JOBE, like that guy who has a book in the Bible) events happen and my attitude gets stinky. Sometimes, I just need to be reminded that Attitude is everything. When I have a good one, no one can bring me down. When I have a bad attitude, everyone knows it--and runs!

Maybe some real cute post-its will help me remember that I choose my attitude every day. Just cause I stub my toe, I can choose to laugh instead of get crabby.

I'm Home and It's Sooo Hot!

2006-07-22T19:04:00.000-07:00

These have the right idea! It is so hot. It hit 116 degrees today. and there are clouds--so it's humitd too! Ick!

I am finally home. They are having major monsoons in Tucson where my aunt and cousing live. But nothing like that here. No rain for the Sonoran Desert! They poured our patio today. Next weekend we will get the carport in front of the garage and the walkway from the garage to the house. We will be getting a quote for the patio cover and I will get a dog run from Lowes. Maybe I will get one of those freestanding pools that are about 3 ft. deep, as the tigers look very cool. We have A/C but keep it at 87 degrees, as it saves us $100/mo. to do that.

I spray myself with spray bottles because my hubby does LIKE the heat. Not 116 degrees, but he certainly doesn't mind the temp of the house. I am trying my best to tolerate it.

My cousin in Tucson has a pool and he uses 2 fountains that come out of the filtered water of the pool to cool his pool. The other option is to put a sprinkler on a floatie and enjoy the cool water. Soon, very soon I will have that pool. Or I will be knocking on Christie's door with my bathing suit on and my floatie and towel. Ha Ha!

Walking With God and Everyday Life

2006-07-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

"Jesus came so that we might have and enjoy life, and have it to the full until it overflows." (John 10:10)

I just had to put this in my blog, because it means so much to me. See.......I am a complainer, especially about little repetive tasks and when things don't go as I EXPECT them to, which they rarely do. I read this today and it hit me right between the eyes. It showed me that I don't have to be "in my prayer closet" to worship God. I can do it every minute of every day--that's what I am made for. When I am not walking with the Lord, I suffer from negative feelings. So how do I solve it? By remembering that I am a child of God at ALL times! Thanks to Joel Osteen's daily word in my email--I was reminded of this.

Today's Word from Joel Osteen

A 17th century monk, Brother Lawrence, found the answer to enjoying the nitty-gritty of everyday life. He was a humble cook in a French monastery, but he authored a book entitled Practicing the Presence of God. In it, Brother Lawrence explained how he was able to turn even the most commonplace and menial tasks, like preparing meals and washing dishes, into acts of praise and communion with God. The key, he wrote, was not to change what you do, but to change your attitude toward what you do. When you begin doing these tasks, realize that you are doing them for God. Use it as an opportunity to worship Him through acts of service. When you do, you will discover pleasure even in taking out the trash.So don't let the enemy deceive you into thinking that you must get away from your daily routine in order to truly relax and enjoy life. Don't wait for your next vacation–enjoy today and every day as a gift from God. Enjoy getting up and eating breakfast. Enjoy going to work. Enjoy mowing the lawn. Enjoy going to the grocery store. Enjoy washing the dishes. You have to do these things anyway–why not choose to enjoy them? When you do, you will go through life with a smile on your face, a spring in your step and you'll enjoy the abundant, overflowing life of victory that God has in store for you.

A Prayer for Today
God, what an amazing and blessed day this will be when I choose to tackle every task with joy and thanksgiving. As I go through my to-do list, I will do so knowing that every day is a gift and I am happy to accept it from my Father in Heaven. In Jesus' name, Amen.

I'm out of town, but still reading blogs

2006-07-17T14:01:00.000-07:00

I am keeping my aunt company, who just lost her husband of 59 years. I will be here until Thursday morning, when I will drive the 3 hours to home. It's hard for me to understand, but there will be no service, no memorial and even no balloons released(my suggestion). It feels so odd not to have a special time to say good bye to my uncle. My cousin and I ran some errands and he and I were talking about saying goodbye to a loved one. He understands that this is what his dad said he wanted.

But a memorial or a service is for the people left behind, not the one who died, isn't it? It's for us who are left behind to deal with the passing in some way. Usually a service in church--which was not an option for my uncle, as he was not a believer in God, or a memorial where friends and family gather to remember and say goodbye.

Maybe just my cousin and I will do something, cause I know that he would like to do something. I'm going to talk to him about it today.

See you all on blog!

Thank God for Blogging Christian Sisters(& Brothers)!

2006-07-13T17:19:00.000-07:00

I admit it, I've been in a depressed funk for about a week. My uncle Fred died(he had been ailing and it wasn't unexpected). But what it did, was bring up memories of my Dad's death in 1998 and my favorite Uncle Dick's death in 2003. A couple of mornings ago, for no reason, I started crying and couldn't stop. Not wailing, just tears running down my face. Another time, I was alone with the dogs in the living room and the sounds that came out of my mouth, scared the dogs and me. It wasn't a wail, but such a sad, mournful sound. I couldn't stop it. It finally stopped. I've learned not to suppress mourning and sadness when it comes, but sometimes, I can wait for a more opportune moment to let go.

If I didn't read these posts each and every day, I could easily slip into a funk that could last for weeks. And, yes, I read my bible and also a spiritually uplifting book as well as 3 daily devotional and a book of prayers. But sometimes, when I am down, I can read, read, read and pray and it gets me nowhere, you know?

I say thanks for blogging sisters(and two brothers), because I read your posts daily and they uplift me. I don't always write comments, but each day, I read:
Carol http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/
Christie http://www.angelfire.com/art2/crickl/view/
Gracious Home www.agracioushome.com
Reverberate My Echo http://reverberate58.blogspot.com/
Ann www.rocrebelgranny.blogspot.com
Sting My Heart www.eph2810.com
Ben Kraker(youth pastor in Oregon) www.thatbenguy.com
Rebecca www.frogandtoadarefriends.com
Rhonda http://mytime-rhonda.blogspot.com/
Diana www.dianaway.blogspot.com
Kelli www.going-deep.blogspot.com
Kim www.hiraeth.blogspot.com
Charles Lord (a pastor in Phoenix) http://web.mac.com/chasrlord/iWeb/Site%202/Blog/Blog.html
Shannon http://rocksinmydryer.com

And several others that I check out from various posting's comments. These blogs save my sanity. When I can't concentrate enough to read and meditate on the bible, when it seems my prayers are dry and don't make it up to heaven(not really true, but when I get depressed it sure seems like it), when I feel hopeless and helpless......I can go to your blogs and read your thoughts that day. All of your posts encourage me whether it's humor or just a daily update. It gets me out of my own muddy puddle and looking around and up.

THANK YOU ALL--PRAISE THE LORD FOR YOU!
Cathee

Working, working, working

2006-07-04T16:17:00.000-07:00

We worked on the patio with pavers of various shapes and sized that we bought used, bark and rocks(called river stones because they are rounded). The big concrete things that are placed around the edge of the bark right now are called "castle blocks" and we are going to do a feature of some sort in the front yard with them. They kind of interlock to make different shapes and sizes of planters.

No sooner had we finished with the patio than a new project was begun. Sanding and refinishing the modular entertainment center. That's the thing laying on it's side.

My husband and I have been getting up early and working until it reaches 100 degrees, then we either come in the house and hibernate, go to town for whatever errands have to be run or we go visiting. Yesterday, we delivered a transmission to Hughes in the industrial area of Phoenix, went to Lowes and bought more bark and stones for the patios, bug spray, scorpion spray(we've seen a few) and stuff to do the refinishing.

I got up real early this morning and sprayed all around the house foundation and window sills. We've been having monsoon-like humidity(no rain) and it seems that increases the bug population. Currently, we have the plague of the beetles. Tiny black ones about the size of lady bugs but real slow and they don't seem to fly. They are very annoying because I can't seem to find a chemical to kill them. If they stayed outside, I wouldn't bother them, but they have ventured into the house. Now they are fair game in my book! They seem to be able to enter the house at will. Phil and I haven't been able to find out where they are coming in though. It's frustrating. I may have to call an exterminator. We have the 3 dogs, so I have to be careful what bug spray I can use.

One thing about projects, at the end of the day, you feel you have accomplished something and you are a good kind of tired when you do manual labor.

We've Been Working Hard

2006-06-30T20:01:00.000-07:00

I'll try to catch up with posting and reading posts tomorrow......

My husband and I have been working for the last couple of days on our former carport , now patio. I'll bet we sweated off several pounds as well as built up some unused muscles in our backs and arms from moving pavers, stones and then moving them again when we decided to rearrange!

I'll try to take some pictures tomorrow morning and post them. It doesn't look like we spent all that time and effort, but we know we did!

And the thing is, all this will move out when we flip the front door/patio door later on. Our house is on the lot backward(we bought it this way). The front door is at the back of the house and the patio door is at the front. It will cost way less for us to switch the doors than to have the house re-set on the property. That's why the patio we just spent so much time on is only temporary!

A request for prayer

2006-06-28T18:26:00.000-07:00

Tina and Dale

My friend, Tina, lost her cousin to a highway accident this week. Please remember her in your prayers. I understand her great loss, as I am also close to one of my male cousins. Dale was an incredible photographic artist who travelled everywhere to art shows to sell his art. No one did any work like his--it was unique and awe-inspiring. Even his frames were hand-made by him and were also one-of-a-kind works of art in themselves. He was a very personable fellow and she loved him very much. This is going to be very hard for her and she needs your prayers.
Thank you so much, anyone who reads this and prays for her!

Treasure Tuesday--my car

2006-06-27T09:46:00.000-07:00

Treasure Tuesday is hosted by Faith over at http://faithfulmommy.typepad.com/

We were blessed to be able to afford our Magnum last year when we sold our house in Orange County and moved to AZ. It's the first new car either one of us has had in our lives. And since it is on the same chassis as the Chrysler 300, it drives like a luxury car. We looked at every SUV out there and decided that this would be our SUV. Since it's a wagon, we can put the back seats down and haul stuff. And we get an average of 27 miles a gallon.

We looked at little cars(Toyotas, Hondas etc) with better gas mileage but with 3 dogs and luggage on a trip to Mom's we decided that it would never fit. I try to visit my Mom about once a month. The 250 mile drive is so much better in this car. We looked at the Toyota, Honda and Nissan SUVs which didn't get good gas mileage and cost a lot more than the Magnum.

It's such a blessing to have a car that runs beautifully, is comfortable, has air conditioning that really works and I feel safe in. I thank the Lord everytime I drive it. I generally use part of my driving time to pray, which keeps me sane on the long drives I have to get to civilization.

Saturday Photo Hunt Subject-Love

2006-06-24T10:17:00.000-07:00

My neice with her doggie that she got from the pound.

http://tnchick.com/

Friday's Feast #99

2006-06-23T11:23:00.000-07:00

Appetizer
On a scale of 1-10 with 10 being highest, how much do you like your job? Job? What's that? I have been searching for one for a long time, with no success.

Soup
When was the last time you think you were lied to? I have a relative in my life who exaggerates and bends the truth all the time. I usually believe only about half of what that person tells me.

Salad
Share some lyrics from own of your favorite songs. How he loves us with great love he who sits enthroned above for our lives he spilled his blood sent his spirit like a flood Children of the Living God sing to the living God.....Fernando Ortega, "This Bright Hour" CD

Main Course
What do you do/take when you are in pain? It varies. Tylenol if it's not too bad, Aleve if it's joint or muscle pain and both if it's really bad. I cannot stand to take Vicodin or any of the codeine products--I hate how they make me feel.

Dessert
Fill in the blanks: My Husband is very considerate. Right now, he is vacuuming. He already did the dishes!

Everyday Things--Coffee!

2006-06-23T10:53:00.000-07:00

Coffee is my favorite everyday thing!

My indulgence is 100% Kona. No other coffee tastes like it. and it has to be Hilo Hattie's Kona. Several years ago, a friend (salesman whose territory includes Hawaii) brought me some back for my birthday. Forget those chocolate covered macadamia nuts--give me Kona coffee. I drink it hot and black. It bites back!

As coffee goes, Kona is very expensive, but by the cup, it's still a good deal--cheaper than a can of Pepsi. I used to live near a mall that had a Hilo Hattie store, but since we moved, I just order online.

Just like Carol at "She Lives" http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/ I limit myself to 2 cups a day, or one cup if I plan to have iced tea or iced coffee in the afternoon.

Everyday Things is brought to you by: Everyday Mommy at http://everydaymommy.typepad.com/everyday_mommy/
Thank you!

Thursday Thirteen Why I Love My Spouse

2006-06-22T08:41:00.000-07:00

I need to do this one. Phil and I have been sick for almost 2 weeks and I am tired of being in the house with him for that long.

1. He is considerate. In big ways and little ways

2. He loves dogs. Actually, he loves cats too. We used to have 2 kitties before they got very old.

3. He's easy going. I get MY way a lot!

4. He never makes fun of me when I go somewhere and get lost. My nickname is "WrongWay"

5. He lets me tell him how to drive. Sometimes, when he's had enough of it, he'll call me "Hyacinth" after that lady on the British comedy "Keeping Up Appearances" who henpecks her husband.

6. He watches the TV shows that I like. If I am watching home improvement shows, he goes in the den and plays games on the computer.

7. He doesn't mind if I do my own thing. I go visiting friends and family and he holds down the fort.

8. He doesn't mind if I have the light on to read when we go to bed, or if I can't sleep, turn the light back on. (That's a big one for me, because I have sleeping problems and reading settles me down)

9. He shares in the household chores. Everything except what I call poop patrol. He gets gaggy around the dog poop. I don't mind picking it up, so I do it.

10. He takes the trash out. I hate that job and will only do it if he's out of town. Probably a fair trade for poop patrol, don't you think?

11. He climbs the ladders. I am afraid of going past the second step on a ladder. I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of falling!

12. Even though he is a non-believer, he never gripes or sabotages my attending church and church functions, nor interrupt me when I pray with friends on the phone.

13. He loves me and puts up with me, and that says it all.

Wordless Wednesday

2006-06-21T09:26:00.000-07:00

To participate go to: www.reverberate58.blogspot.com

Matthew 13:47-50 "Again, the kingdom of heaven is like unto a net, that was cast into the sea........."

Works for me! Trifocals

2006-06-21T08:10:00.000-07:00

These are my glasses and do they ever make my life easier! I have an astigmatism, but could always see pretty much okay without my glasses. Then I got old.....er, or rather my eyes got old and I couldn't read without glasses. So I first got some with bifocals. Those worked great! I could see really clearly, you know like seeing the individual leaves on trees and they made reading my tiny bible print super clear. It was fabulous!

Then, I noticed that when using the computer at work for the spreadsheets became more and more difficult to see clearly. I had a 19" flat panel and it didn't matter where on my desk it was, I was straining to see it, except if I brought it close to my face and tilted my head up so I could look at it thru the bifocals. That gave me neck problems after a while.

Then it was time to see the optometrist again for a check up. I told him my troubles with the computer screen and he said he had the solution, trifocals. He asked me if I wanted the blended lenses, but recommended the cut lenses for the first time user of trifocals. I got them, put them on and couldn't wait to get back to work to try them out. What a great invention--trifocals--they were made for computer work.

I have a friend who refuses to buy glasses. He cannot read any small print and uses whoever is near to read for him. He just bought a huge computer monitor and has the print as big as it will go. If he must read something and no one is around, he has a pair of his mother's reading glasses that he puts on, or if the print is very small, he uses a magnafying glass he keeps on the desk. One of my aunts never wore her glasses except when she was alone. Is it vanity or do they just hate something sitting on their nose? I never could figure that one out.

Treasure Tuesday

2006-06-20T09:24:00.000-07:00

Here's 2 of my treasures. My nephew Dave and his son, Michael. This was taken on Mother's Day.

Dave is a wonderful guy. He is a giving and caring man. If you are his friend and you need him for anything at all--he is there. I am close with my neice and nephew because I was always very close to my sister. Growing up we always spent a lot of time with aunts and uncles and cousins. My son and I always spent a lot of time with my sister and and her son and daughter, almost like siblings. So I we were always close. He turned 30 last November and he has his own life. He lives in the next town over from his grandmother. I try to talk to him about once a week and see him when I visit my Mom.

He is a fine Christian man and he is a youth pastor at his church. I am so lucky to have him as part of my family and in my life!

I'm Full of Excuses..........

2006-06-19T13:01:00.000-07:00

As I said! I have an excuse. A fellow(female) sufferer put this on her post about a year ago. I thought it was hilarious but true. I took a low-dose estrogen pill for a few years after my symptoms first appeared. Then my doctor and I decided about a year ago that I would go off the pill. When my mom was in her 70's she developed breast cancer--with no history of it in the family. I discussed with my doctor that she had taken HRT (hormone replacement therapy) for a really long time. I had heard the warnings about the link between breast cancer and HRT. Mom made thru and is heading for her 84th birthday next month. She detected it when it was still the size of a sesame seed, due to her active immune system. She went to the doctor to investigate a swollen lymph node under her arm, which led him to the cancer in the breast. She was going thru the surgery, chemo and radiation during the time that my dad was burned in a boat accident and subsequently passed away. My mother is a strong woman--I know that. Just try to argue with her to change her mind about something!

Anyway, I quit the estrogen pills a year ago. Last month, when I saw my doctor, we discussed the fact that I am still experiencing the symptoms in somewhat a lesser degree than when I first quit taking the pills, but still have them. He informed me that I may NEVER get over all the symptoms. I guess that why Mom took them for so long and one of my 80 yr old friends still takes them. And also, my body still remembers, "that time of the month", except that now it falls around the time of the full moon. I get PMS-ish, I crave chocolate (usually I am not that fond of chocolate--really!) and sometimes just a little crazy.

Yes, I tried Estroven, I even tried doubling it. I also tried the herbal supplements, even going so far as buying the ones that have special pills for daytime and special pills for night time. Pfffft! They don't work for my body. What works best for me is exercise every day, a relative low carb/nutritious diet and lots of water. Only small amounts of caffeine and no caffeinated soda. I have to keep my red meat consumption on the low side too. If I am using ground meat in a dish it is not hamburger, but turkey. I've found ways to make turkey burgers more palatable too. Lunchmeat is a no-no for me, as well as hot dogs, smoked sausage and brats--!!sigh!!

We eat lots of veggies (raw, steamed or stir-fried), Praise the Lord, I've always loved veggies. We also eat several meatless meals with either meat substitutes or beans as the protien. Why can't I lose weight, if I eat so healthy? Cause as the doc says, I still eat too much. Ding-dang it! What a drag it is getting old. Your metabolism slows down unless you do heavy duty aerobic exercises, you know, like going to a gym and "feeling the burn"???

There's no magic pill........yet. It's the old adage: Eat less, exercise more = lose weight

No excuses, just hard work!

Lord, today I pray to leave excuses behind. Give me Your strength to eat less and push myself a little harder when exercising. I know that if I have the faith of a mustard seed that You can do this for me, I can move mountains(of fat).

Here's the picture of Chickie

2006-06-18T15:57:00.000-07:00

For everyone that commented that they couldn't see Chickie's picture, here she is.

I missed the Friday Feast, so here it is......

2006-06-17T17:20:00.000-07:00

Keeping cool is an art form!

Appetizer

What is a word that you use that would not be considered common?

Hincky…..I use it to illustrate if something isn’t quite right. Then there’s this word that I picked up from a close friend……..Combustionated…..meaning someone is standing too close or a situation is making you feel closed in.

Soup

What theme of calendar do you have on your wall this year?

Racecars in the office where the computer is and a free one on the kitchen fridge.

Salad

Name 3 people you speak with by telephone a regular basis.

1. Mom 2. Sister 3. Marlene

Main Course

If you could buy a new outfit for someone you know - who would it be and what would you purchase for them?

For my sister. I know her taste. I have bought her many things that she really likes and tends not to buy for herself. She looks great in color. I would probably buy her a turquoise or teal silky mandarin collared tunic blouse and a black flared or straight skirt in a soft and flowy fabric.

Dessert

What is the last beverage you drank?

Iced tea that I brewed this morning from tea leaves. A combination of Jasmine and Darjeeling. Put over purchased ice—no sugar.

Everyday Things

2006-06-17T13:53:00.000-07:00

Are my poochies things? Well, they aren't people, so are they things. And since they are, they are my Favorite Everyday things!

First, is Chiquita, the Pekingese, we call her Chickie--we've had her the longest. We keep her hair cut short, so she may look funny for a Peke, but it's hot here and she likes to be outside. She is 10 years old and we got her from our vet when she was 5 yrs. She was blind when we got her(we had previously had a blind dog, so we knew what we were in for). She was a "dumped" dog. The people who brought her in wanted her put down because she had gone blind. She had been badly neglected and our vet kept her for 6 weeks after we said we would take her so that she could be nursed back to health. Now she has gone almost totally deaf. She wears a diaper in the house, because often she cannot find her way to the door to ask out. She is my lovey girl and like to sit on my lap and get petted. She asks for pets by putting her front paws together and moving them up and down. She like to sit outside and do some barking at least once a day.

Second, is Harry the Shih Tzu. 10 years old. We got him used when he was 8 years old from a guy who got remarried and her dogs did not get along with Harry. It was us or the dog pound. He is feisty and playful and talks a lot. He is a woo-woo dog(that the sound he makes when he plays--"Ah woo woo). He sleeps beside my husband at night and sits beside him on the couch. He is our alpha dog.

Lastly, is Teddy, the ???? Poodle/we don't know???. He closes his eyes when he sees the camera is going to flash. He has golden eyes. He was found at the side of a busy street near an unoccupied area and the canal, by one of the workers when our friend was building his house. They guy brought him to us, asking if we knew of anyone who had lost a dog. My husband took him and I snatched the puppy immediately. I knew he was going home with us. He was dehydrated and starving. When we took him to our vet, she said he was about 8 weeks old. So he is now 6 months old. He is a joy. He is full of energy and revs up the older dogs. He is sweet and full of fun. We've had many dogs in our lives, but never had a puppy. It's a new experience. Thankfully, I have several friends to give me advice and potty training was pretty easy with cage training.

I praise the Lord every day for my little companions. They listen to me when my husband is tired of hearing me complain. They hang out with me when I'm on the computer. They comfort me when I'm sad and rejoice with me when I'm happy. They're always glad to see me when I come in the house, even if I've just been outside watering the plants. They sit with me, give me puppy kisses. They entertain me with their antics. They are always happy. All the dogs in my life have taught me many things. How to love unconditionally. How to live in the moment and not worry about tomorrow. How to deal with death and loss. I know a lot about dogs and I understand that they are not just "little people". I know that their loyalty comes from the pack instinct. They want to please me because my spouse and I are the pack leaders. But they are my favorite everyday poochie-doodles!

Blogger.com got me good!

2006-06-16T14:53:00.000-07:00

Well, let's see if this one sticks!

The last two posts I've done(Wed & Thurs) have disappeared from my blog. How about that? As I read more and more blogs, I have read about the disgust with Blogger.com, but I haven't had any problems with it, so just shrugged those comments off. I assumed (makes an ass of you and me) that since I hadn't had any problems in the past, I was good to go.

After I publish my post, I always go to my blog website and check to see if it posted and how it looks. I did that on Wednesday and on Thursday. But today, I went to my blog and the first post that came up was Tuesday's. Yikes! I've been robbed!

I suppose that I should look around for a new blog site? I know that Carol at "She Lives" uses Typepad, while other bloggers have their own websites. I am kinda lame on all this web stuff....oh I can get around it just fine and actually can find just about anything I want to look up. It's the programming end of it, where I fall on my face. I never could figure out how to put a picture of myself on my blog. Oh, blogger gives you a tutorial, sort of, and I thought I followed the instructions to the letter, but the picture never appeared. Couldn't figure out the links either.

Wonder if there is a class on web publishing at my local community college......I'll have to check it out.

Treasure Tuesday

2006-06-13T18:06:00.000-07:00

This clock was a treasure. Yep I know the picture is not clear and if I had taken it to the Antiques Roadshow(which I watch), they would have said that I wasn't worth much. But, it was the only thing I had that belonged first to my great grandmother Sandford and then to my Grandmother. My uncle had it for a while too, but one time when he and his family were moving, I fished it out of the trash( he had thrown it out because it quit working).

I don't have it any longer either. It was stolen when our house was burglarized last year.

That burglary proved to me that where your heart is, is where your treasure lies. I realized that attaching memories to objects and then holding on to those objects can hold you down to this earth. I was a packrat. I had kept too many things. We had moved from a small house to this large one and it was still packed with things.

After the burglary, I watched an organizing show on TV and the person who was helping the packrat get rid of stuff told her this: "If it is so important, you need to display the object in a place of honor. BUT, things are not memories. You don't need things to keep your memories alive." I remember that when I want to packrat.

This helped me lately when we were unloading the container into our newly built garage. I was able to let go of a lot of things that I had made into treasures and they really weren't. I was able to pass on collections and clothing by donating them. And, more importantly, I am no longer the receiver of all the things my relatives no longer want.

So now treasures are real treasures. All my little ceramic and metal boxes were stolen and recently my aunt gave me a new one. It's a treasure that I don't have a picture of yet.

The Lord is Speaking to Me

2006-06-12T14:38:00.000-07:00

"Watch over your heart with all diligence, for from it flow the springs of life. Put away from you a deceitful mouth, and put devious lips far from you." Proverbs 4:23-24

"We want to encourage you today to watch what you are saying. Your words have creative power and you can use them as a destructive force or as an instrument of blessing. If you continually speak negative words over your life, then eventual defeat will be the result. In the same way, if you speak words of faith and victory, you will see a harvest of blessing not only in your own life, but also in the lives of those around you. When you find yourself in a difficult situation, don't say the first thing that pops into your head. Learn to control your emotions and take those thoughts captive. When you use words of faith and victory God will fight your battles for you. You'll overcome every challenge that you face and you will live the abundant life that God has in store for you."

So, just as I was writing a comment on someone else's blog, about where I get my inspiration to write, and email came in with my 2 daily devotionals that come from Joel Osteen Ministries and The Purpose Driven Life. The above is from Joel Osteen Ministries.

I have been putting a lot of effort into curbing my tongue. When I get frustrated with a situation, I say bad words. As a matter of fact, as I was sitting here, typing, this particularly persistant fly wanted to land on my face. I waved him away a few times, then he landed on my lip. Honestly!
So I picked up some papers and tried to chase him down and swat him, with no luck. Can you feel the frustration level rising? He'd hide, only to come back, just as I managed to type a few words. That was it! As I stood, brandishing the papers to swat, I began calling him a string of words that would come out of a sailor's mouth.

The second I heard myself, I stopped and prayed a little prayer that the Lord would give me the strength to let go of anger and frustration, so that it doesn't pour out of my mouth. I know that there are things I need to let go of so that the Lord can fill those spaces with love and joy. Day by day, I am locating them and sweeping them out of my life.

God, make me an instrument of blessing to those around me. I praise You for giving me self control to hold my tongue rather than give life to negative thoughts. I want to have a positive life full of joy; let that be reflected in what I say today. In Jesus' name – Amen.

My thoughts on blogging and reading blogs

2006-06-09T12:01:00.000-07:00

Carol at "She Lives" http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/ asks(in orange type) My answers in lavender. Thanks, Carol for another stimulating topic of conversation!

--How do find the blogs you read regularly? I found Carol by going on google and putting in the search: Chrisitan women blogs--Praise the Lord that hers came up. I've gotten most of the other blogs that I read from her blog, either on the sidebar or memes.
-- When you leave a comment, do you frequently return to that post to check for the author's response? When I visit a blog for the first or second time, I rarely leave a comment. I save it as a favorite and usually visit it as often as I am on the computer. If there is something in the post, I will make a comment.
-- What types of situations might cause you to stop reading a blog that you once enjoyed? So far, I haven't stopped reading anyone's blog on my favorites. One of my favorite ladies disappeared. She had 2 blogs. I loved reading her postings. Veronica/Ronni was a gifted insightful writer and her blogs went blank and I have not been able to find that she is writing a blog anywhere on the net.
-- How much personal privacy do you try to maintain when posting on your own blog? I try to keep some personal privacy about where I live. You never know who could be reading in this day and age of identity theft and weirdos. I work at keeping the blog about my thoughts and feelings. Discussing information about relatives and friends is a NO NO.
-- What are your thoughts about encouraging offline friends to read your blog? I have told all of my friends that I have a blog and given the web address, but no one has said that they have ever read it. Oh well.....
-- What criteria do you look for in the blogs you enjoy reading? Or perhaps I should ask, what factors do your favorite blogs all have in common? Criteria and commonalilty is 1.) Christian, 2.) Women, 3.) Insightful writing 4.) Writing that stimulates me to think, pray and write.
-- Are there any blogs you read on a regular basis in which the author frequently expresses beliefs or opinions that completely contradict your own? No, I haven't come across a blog that completely contradicts my beliefs, since my criteria for finding blogs is VERY specific.
-- If you disagree with a blogger do you usually voice your perspective so they can see things from a different angle, or just ignore theirs and click away? If I have a different opinion, I would always leave a comment. Does the size of the person's readership influence this for you? Nope, size of readership doesn't influence me. I see it as they are still just one person, just like me.
-- Do you read and/or post on Saturdays and Sundays? Or are you predominantly at M-F blogger? I read all days of the week, but not every day. If my husband and I are driving into town, and I don't get up extra early to check in, I'll miss that day of blogging. Because I am a morning person and by evening, I don't usually want to even look at the computer.

5 Days of Blog

2006-06-08T07:42:00.000-07:00

I have to apologize for signing up for 5 Days of Blog and then not posting all week. My days lately have consisted of heavy(and I mean that in pounds) physical labor. At the end of the day, my muscles--even in my hands are so sore that I literally cannot type! We have a very large container which was filled with items from our 3-car garage when we moved here last year. We have just finished putting up our new garage and have been moving everything from one to the other--not finished yet either. While we were at it, we also sorted through everything and so are no longer storing anything we will not use. So there's my excuse. I am so sorry for not honoring my committment. Next time, I will think about what is coming up in the week before I make an online commitment like that one. Thank you everyone who left your wonderful, encouraging comments.

Last night, I was reading in James about how what comes out of our mouths shows who we really are. I have a bad habit of using bad words (not using the Lord's name in vain, but rather talking like a sailor). It seems this last week as I am very tired, those words flow out of my mouth like water from a waterfall. I hear myself say them and flinch. I don't want to say them, but I do anyway. And I realized--I am trying to control this bad habit on my own strength. I haven't prayed about it, because, as usual, I think, "I can do this thing on my own--the Lord doesn't need to be bothered with something so trivial." But having read the verses, the Lord spoke to me about the words coming out of my mouth.

The verses were James 3: 5-13 "5 Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth! 6 And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell. 7 For every kind of beasts, and of birds and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind: 8 But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison. 9 Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God. 10 Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be. 11 Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? 12 Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.13 Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom."

I have never had such a strong and immediate conviction. Continuing to use bad words in anger or frustration is a very poor witness for my unsaved spouse. He doesn't use ANY bad words. He has always thought it was funny that I did. But lately as my sore muscles and frustration level has risen, he has commented several times to me about my "anger". I try to excuse myself by saying I am just frustrated, but once I started hearing myself, it does sound very angry.

I pray, Father, that you give me your strength to let go of the need to vent frustration (and anger) by speaking bad words that spew a bad witness to my spouse. I ask, Lord that you put a lock on my lips and mind so that the words don't even form. Let me praise you instead. Let my life be a prayer to you, so that I may be a witness of Your Love and Kindness. Thru the name of Jesus I claim this. Amen

Post About Blogging

2006-06-04T14:06:00.000-07:00

Ok, since Carol at "She Lives" brought up the subject "God reads my blog" and that maybe we should consider making it an uplifting testimony. I want to always be honest and forthright in my postings and as a Christian woman, I have feelings, opinions and thoughts that I would like to put down in writing. But when I post on a public forum, I am always aware that my post will be read by others. My blog is always going to show all sides of me. Sometimes, I just want to have fun and other times, I can be very serious.

At any moment, Mom, son, sister, niece, nephew, cousins, friends or people I don't even know could be reading my blog. Therefore, no disclosing of events in others lives is allowed without their written consent (e-mail) first. I know someone who really hurt a person that they wrote about. It's not even okay if I "change the names(and even relationship) to protect the innocent", because it's too easy to figure out who it in many instances--or--it can be misinterpreted to be someone you never intended. Gossip is gossip, no matter how it comes out. Best to speak for myself and myself alone. Address my own opinions and issues and leave others out of the posting.

My blog is not a sermonette. It is about my life. Sometimes, I am unhappy and discouraged. When I see it in print, I am encouraged to pray about that and to ask for prayer as well. I am forgiven by the blood of Jesus and I am not perfect. I am assured of everlasting life and look forward to the trumpet sound to call me up into the air to meet Jesus. But while I am still a sojourner on this earth, I will strive to be who I am--a Child of God who is a human being. This blog is a record of my journey. It may not be pretty or serious all the time, but it's me!

I have fought depression my whole life, even as a child. I have gone to psychotherapy and have taken various medications. I don't do either now. I have finally come to understand that my life has dramatic ups and downs--it's just the way I feel. Sometimes, I experience these ups and downs daily and other times, the cycle is longer. With the Lord's help, I have learned to ride the roller coaster of my emotional life. I know now I can pray and rest assured that when I am walking through "the valley of the shadow of death", I need not fear. The Lord comforts and protects me. I walk out of that valley into the "Son"light. I experience joy and serenity. These feelings do not have any power over me any longer. They're just feelings, they don't define me.

Hannah Hurnard wrote a few allegories; the first being "Hinds Feet in High Places". That's why I almost always think of Jesus as my shepherd who leads me into the high places. When I have a "down" time, I almost always ask Jesus to take my hand to lead me out. Sometimes, He has to carry me like a little lost sheep. I think of the companions that walk with the heroine of the story. Joy holding one hand and Sorrow holding the other hand. That story always said to me that in order to feel Joy, I will have to let myself also feel the Sorrow.

Father God, thank you for direct access through Jesus. I praise you today because of the constant blessings and insights you give me. I give thanks for the Christian women online who post and inspire me.

Friday Feast

2006-06-02T17:26:00.000-07:00

APPETIZER
How funny on a scale of 1 to 10 am I?
I'm about a 5. Cannot tell a joke to save my life. I love to laugh at jokes. That's what attracted me to my sp0use. He can really tell a joke, and he can still make me laugh!

SOUP
A local restaurant I would recommend to a visitor?
We've been here a year now, and I have been very disappointed in the restaurants. I came from So. Calif and could name 100 fabu restaurants there. Coffee Shop--Mimi's in Goodyear. I'm still looking for a good Chinese, Mexican(or Southwest) and Sushi restaurants. For steak, you can't beat Ruth's Chris Steakhouse.

SALAD
A lesson I was lucky enough to learn the easy way?
How to bargain. Almost everything you buy is negotiable. My former boss, Marco, taught me this. I used to think he was shamelessly cheap when he would bargain over purchases. Then I realized, that's how he got rich and stayed rich(good stewardship)--he never paid more than he absolutely had to for any item that he bought. I started doing it and save money all the time now.

MAIN COURSE
Where would you like to be 5 years from now?
Working as a Patient Advocate in a hospital. Either as a volunteer position or be paid for it. Patients who don't have family or friends to intercede for them with the overworked and understaffed hospital workers(RNs, LVNs, etc) can fall thru the cracks.

DESSERT
Headline on the front page of a newspaper dated June 2, 2106?
"THE 1,000 YEAR REIGN OF JESUS A GREAT SUCCESS"

Welcome Home to DD

2006-06-02T17:12:00.000-07:00

WELCOME HOME!

GOD ANSWERS PRAYER AND HE LOVES ALL HIS CHILDREN

Love and prayers always,

Cathee

13 Things I Hate About Driving

2006-06-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

1. It ALWAYS takes longer to get there than I think it's going to take.
2. If it's going to take longer than I think and I leave extra early, I get there way too soon and end up looking like I am loitering.
3. The Phoenix traffic is too fast, too slow.
4. Crazy drivers (I gave up being one of them--I am not crazy enough!)
5. Every place I go is far from my home.
6. The absurd cost of gas.
7. The traffic usually gets to me and I lose my temper.
8. Even if I am being a courteous driver, I cannot make everyone happy--someone usually manages to flip me off or honk at me.(for no reason that I can determine)
9. The drive used to be boring, but now I have found used books on CD--pretty cool!
10. Since the drive is usually long, I end up eating a meal on the road(don't make good choices about what to eat. Occasionally, I remember to bring something to eat)
11. I usually (almost always, for some reason) forget to bring something and have to turn around and go back home to get it.
12. My spouse always critisizes the way I drive, so mostly, I am the passenger.
13. The air pollution in Phoenix makes me want to hold my breath when I have to go to the City.

Satan's Victories Spoiled

2006-06-01T10:37:00.000-07:00

For a few weeks now, our pastor has been going thru the effects of Satan on Christians. Last week, he talked about Christian marriages and how Satan can effect them. We see that the emphasis of Satan's current workings in our world is tearing down the family.

There are many ways for Satan to reap victory over Christian families. Today's society and the pressures of living on this planet are hard on Christian husbands and wives. The main push is to "take care of ME". Think FIRST about MY needs. What do "I" want? Is my spouse fullfilling MY NEEDS? I need to spoil myself sometimes......... That's what's put out there every day in all forms of media that is bombarding us. We take it in and it's stored in our subconscious.

Guess what? That is totally backward! If I am living for the Lord, I am thinking of others. I do everything as unto God, not for recognition, not for self-satisfaction or thinking that it will be returned in kind. I am to offer myself as a living sacrifice, every day, all day. If I can do this, how can I ever be dissatisfied, unhappy or depressed? If I am in His Will for me, Satan can NEVER have victory over me. If I keep my eyes on Jesus, give of myself and follow His teaching instead of listening to the world, I can live a happy fulfilled life.

Maybe my spouse will never accept the Lord and be saved, but I will continue to pray and treat him like the head of the household should be treated, with respect and love. I will be faithful to Jesus and offer my day to Him each morning and thank Him for the day when it's over. I am happy to be God's child and I know He will take care of all my needs. I don't have to expect my spouse to fulfill me or grant my wishes. God will aid me in my daily walk and lift me up on wings like eagles. He will take me to the High Places and I will walk with Jesus.

I claim this today as His daughter. Jesus has made me worthy thru His sacrifice on the cross. I would be ungrateful if I didn't not claim it and praise God for being a child of the King!

Soaring

2006-05-29T11:24:00.000-07:00

A Peregrine falcon fearlessly attacks an eagle who is threatening her nest.

I read Diana's blog today and it conjured up a recurring dream I have had. Not recently, although I wish for it.

I am soaring above the earth, holding on to Jesus's hand. I can feel the air on my face and through my hair. The air smells pure and sweet. The air is that perfect temperature and humidity. Warm, yet cool as I glide through it. Sometimes, in the dream, it is daytime, other times it is night, with a moon. I am completely at peace and comfortable with being high in the sky. Just recalling the dream gives me a sense of serenity.

Jesus lets go of my hand and I start to drop, ever so slowly. I look toward Him and I am assured that I will not fall, I just have to rest assured. I do and I fly and fly and fly.

I usually wake from this dream smiling. I hope a little part of heaven is that we will be able to soar about and to work and not grow tired.

"Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:30

Often these days, as we work on the house and yard, I wish I could work and not grow tired or get sore muscles. I am digging a flower garden under our bedroom windows. The soil here is clay-y. It is moon dusty when dry, when you wet it, it becomes runny and sticky, then when that dries, it's hard as rock. In fact, the dirt does form rock and it's called caleachie. So digging is very difficult and you have to amend the soil before you can plant anything. I am moving the plants from the side of the house to the front because we are going to put a concrete sidewalk from the garage to the side door. I was told there shouldn't be plantings right next to the house because it will undermine the soil next to the greenboard that skirts the crawlspace under the house. We can end up with pools of water under the house and grow mosquitos. Don't want that with the West Nile Virus present in the Phoenix area.

On that note, I'll get back to digging.

5 Thought Provoking Questions

2006-05-26T09:30:00.000-07:00

This is a picture of the landscaping that we put in. You can't see the 4 bouganvillas next to the carport cause they are in the shade.

1) What is your life verse?
2) Give a bit of your testimony
3) Do you have a favorite preacher?
4) What's the best Bible Study you've ever done?
5) What do you feel God's calling is on your life?

These questions are not original with me. Saw these questions on Carol's She Lives Blog http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/

It's good to have your thoughts provoked.

1) What is your life verse? Romans 5 v1-5 Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.
2) Give a bit of your testimony Raised Catholic, including Catholic school through High School. Walked away, at 17, at 19, married, had my son at 23, accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior 2 years after that. My walk used to be affected by the church or bible study I was attending, getting too involved with people and gossip. I remarried at 35 (to a non-believer, thinking I could save him--he is a good man, just won't let go and accept Christ) I pray for his salvation daily. If I had to do it again, even after 24 years of marriage, I wouldn't marry a non-believer. He doesn't interfere with my faith, we just don't share spiritual belief like we share everything else. I found a wonderful small church to attend and communicate online, by phone and thru blogs daily to strengthen my walk with Jesus. I pray every morning at the same time of day with a friend who is 500 miles from me.
3) Do you have a favorite preacher? I love to listen to Billy Graham and am reading his new book, The Journey.
4) What's the best Bible Study you've ever done? I'm still doing it. My Women's Devotional Bible. It has writings by respected Christian women and verses to read each day. I also like my One Minute Bible that I read before going to bed.
5) What do you feel God's calling is on your life? Perserverence. Don't quit, don't give up or give in. To pray without ceasing, to find out His Will for me for that day and be open to walking that direction regardless of fear.

I'm Glad That God Is My Co-pilot

2006-05-25T17:29:00.000-07:00

One of the blogs I read is Crickl's Nest at http://www.angelfire.com/art2/crickl/view/
She wrote last week about driving in Phoenix being scary. I have said that ever since we moved here(to the far West Valley, not to Phoenix) a year ago. We came from Orange County where the freeways are packed all the time. But the driving style is completely different, somehow. For one thing, in Arizona big trucks, pickups with trailers of all sort can drive in any lane and go as fast as the cars. THAT scares me. How would you like to have all the traffic up ahead come to a screeching halt and see an 18-wheeler in your rear view mirror barrelling down on you? When I lived in the OC and drove 19 miles to work on 3 freeways--which took 45 min. each morning and up to 2 hrs. each evening, I only had one minor accident in all my 40 driving years there. I was a fast driver--keeping up with the cars in the fast lane--but a safe driver.

Since we moved, I have slowed down for one reason only--to save on gas. There have been many trips to Phoenix, but mostly we go to Goodyear and Avondale to do most of our shopping. Yesterday, I had 2 near misses, which made me glad that I am a saved believer in Jesus. I know where I'm going when I die!

First incident: A pickup, towing a trailer with a new Eclipse on it whizzed by me then got caught in traffic and proceeded to jump lanes to get around traffic. He got caught behind a slow line of traffic. I was going by him in the fast lane(there are only 2 lanes on each side on the 10 Fwy out where we live), when he swung into my lane. If I hadn't been able to stand hard on my brakes, the trailer he was towing would have sideswiped me. That was scary!

Second incident: Just when I thought I was "home free", a crazy thing happened. To get to my house, I leave the freeway at an exit that has a really big truckstop. I am often stuck behind big rigs turning into the truckstop before I can proceed down the street. I was slowed down to almost a stop while a truck was turning in. He finished his turn and I pressed on the gas. Just then, on my left, came a PT Cruiser passing me as I was accellerating. When the truck finished his turn, I could see 4 cars coming head-on toward that PT. I, once again, slammed on my brakes, trying to stay back as far from the impending crash as I could. I was preparing to turn my wheels and get off the road completely. Somehow, the fellow in the PT managed to get back into the right side of the road before anyone hit him. I'll bet his life flashed before his eyes!

These are merely 2 of many crazy incidents my husband and I have witnessed while travelling the roads of the great Phoenix metro area. Whatza matter with these people? There are always a few that are in a huge hurry and have no regard for anyone else. I heard on the news tonight that a woman was clocked at 103 mph on the 101 Loop(not really a freeway, but goes between 2 major freeways) by the traffic ticket camera--not in the middle of the night, but in the middle of the afternoon! Yikes!

Storing Up in Heaven

2006-05-16T17:29:00.000-07:00

This was last night's sunset there were some high clouds, so I kept watching for the sunset because I knew it would be a really good one. I waited too long and it got too dark for a picture. It was a lot prettier than the picture came out.

We had our landscape plants put in this morning and found out at about 4:00pm a big storm is coming. The winds are blowing the young trees so hard it seems like the leaves will all strip off. I hesitate to go out and look at the 4 bouganvilleas. The plants were expensive and I am distressed that they are all being ruined by the dust storm that is preceeding the big storm front.

We have never had a dust storm here in the year that we have lived here. Then it happens on the same day we put in the plants. The nursery guarantees the plants, but I bet they have a clause for "Acts of God", so probably won't replace any of them.

Oh well, this life is as the grass of the field, too bad that we put so much effort into it. This just shows me how impermanent life is. My concern should be the Kingdom of God, not how my front yard looks. I was concerned about the heat, which today, got up to 103 degrees. I hadn't heard any news about a big storm coming until we turned on the news at 4:30 today.

That's the one thing that I have such trouble with. If I only think on the things of God, how do I balance it with the earthly things? Should I have taken in 3 dogs or sponsored a child in a 3rd world country? Should I have bought 2 trees and some plants for the front yard or donated that money to the missions? Should I go to the movies to see X-Men III on Saturday night, or put that much additional into the collection plate on Sunday? My husband is a non-believer and would prefer that I not give any money at all to church, since I still have not found a job and am not bringing any money into the household. So he feels that any money I donate is his money......sort of.

I pray about these questions frequently, have not received an answer from God and don't have any peace about them. They nag at me every time I spend any money. I pray to the Lord to give me the answers.

Deep Roots

2006-05-02T07:52:00.000-07:00

I thought I would have those plants moved by now. Nope! Those desert plants have very deep roots. I'm still watering and digging.

All this work to move the plants serves to remind me of the deep roots I need to have in my faith. And how it takes a lot of work to put down those roots. I want to be strong and sturdy, upright and sure. The way to do that is to read, pray and put the Lord first in my life.

My friend is keeping me company on this journey, as she had decided to do the same. It is wonderful to be praying each morning at 7:00 am, knowing that at the same time, she is praying with me. Today we check in by phone with each other on our progress. We have also made a committment to exercise and eat right so that we are caring for our earthly bodies as good servants should.

It's funny, too how things fall into place. I rarely watch the Oprah show, but yesterday, it was so hot, that I sat down, turned on t.v. and watched it. Dr. Mehmet Oz (renowned heart surgeon) was on talking about food and exercise. The show gave me some new insights about processed food and renewed my resolve in healthy cooking. It also gave me a boost that my mere 30 minutes 5 days a week on the treadmill was doing me good. And all that digging--that's my strength training! Processed foods are literally killing us. High fructose corn syrup, hydrogenated oils and sodium are in practically every processed food and fast food that we consume. Saturated fats--fat from all 4-legged animals clog our arteries, but those hydrogenated oils are the worst. They turn to stone (plaque) in our veins. And they are in everything from crackers and popcorn to Lean Cuisines and ice cream. What can we eat?? Anything that comes the way God made it. That means we have to plan meals and cook. Get some food discipline.

I saw a lady on the show whose only complaint was that she was tired all the time, in spite of drinking 3 6-packs of diet cola a day. She was 35 pounds overweight(she said) but was really concerned that she was sleeping 12 hours a day and still tired. They looked through her kitchen and found that she was eating 95% processed foods. She didn't go on a diet(food depravation) but rather ate as much as she wanted of the healthy foods. She walked on the treadmill 30 minutes a day and did yoga for 30 minutes too. She lost 43 pounds in 90 days! And she looked fabulous and felt like a new person. Look on the Oprah website at Monday, May 1 for details.

That was inspiring to me. Some processed foods have snuck back into our food. I have sugar-free cookies and sugar-free ice cream. I have whole grain crackers, but usually the CheezIts win out over them. I have protien bars that are sugar-free, but guess what? They have hydrognated oils in them. I am going to talk to Phil today about clearing out the fridge and cupboards and trying this new food plan for the sake of not just our health, but our energy level.

Well, on that note, I'm going to hop in the treadmill!

What we've been doing lately

2006-04-29T09:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, this is the "before" shot. I don't have an "after" shot yet, because we are still working. We were going to move closer to our friend and then house sales got so slow that we were going to have to reduce the price of the house by $20,000. So we decided to stay. We are going ahead with the improvements that we had planned before the robbery last September.

So we are in the process of putting up the garage. It's a pre-fab building 40'x30'. The rebar is going in today, then the footings and slab as soon as the building inspector gives his okay. The garage is going up to the left of the house(the front right corner of the garage will be about where the red truck is sitting in the picture). I am putting some plants in the front yard. Moving them from next to the house to the front yard. You are not supposed to have any large plants next to your house in case of fire--there are no fire hydrants out here in the sticks and your well pump does not have enough pressure to put out a fire. The problem is with the dirt in this area. It is like moondust--except when it gets wet and drys out. Then it's like concrete! So digging holes and digging up plants to move them is a many day process of watering and digging, watering and digging. I moved the smallest plant yesterday and it's roots went down 4 feet. I hope the bigger plants don't go down 10 feet!

We bought a variety of used pavers and have been laying the 12" x 12" flat square in the front porch/carport area. We got some scalloped ones that make a circle and that's what I am putting the plants in. I have 5 of those. Then we have some round ones like stepping stones that we will make a path with. We are going to do a dry creek in the front yard too because if you don't want your yard to wash away during the monsoon season, you need to direct the water.

That's why I am putting the circular things around the plants. Monsoons come here anytime from August to October, but not regularly. You have to rely on the weather service in the Phoenix stations to forewarn of impending storms. There can be major flooding and the washes get full and can be quite dangerous. Monsoon season takes planning.

So, I am going back to work--see you all later!

My Limited Life

2006-04-21T09:23:00.000-07:00

I limit myself and my life. I think, "I can't do that" There should be no such word as can't--it's really "won't". I limit what God can do in my life by my fears and all those are based on is not wanting to look stupid. I know the Lord has much more in store for me. God wants to increase me–He wants to give me more wisdom to make better decisions. He wants to give me a stronger walk so I can overcome my frustration and outbursts. Yesterday He turned on another lightbulb when I spoke (once again)without thinking first. I realized I am often speaking out of emotion instead of thought. Then I say things that I regret saying and even with an apology, cannot really ever take it back. That emotion is based on old crap in my life, not the present! Get unstuck from that old rut of outbursts and apologies. That's not all there is to life. He wants to give me His strength to control my outbursts, so I can be a blessing to others. God has new frontiers for me to explore and higher mountains to climb! So I can say with great confidence that my best days are come.

Proverbs says, "The path of the righteous gets brighter and brighter and brighter." If I'm going to start experiencing these new victories, I must do my part and start thinking the way God thinks. Think positive, find the good in all things. Start expecting the miracles!

Father, sometimes the frustration of the moment consumes me and I lose sight of Your will for me. Let me dig to the root of where that comes from. Search me and remove that diseased part of me. I am ready to experience the wonderful things you have in store for me!

10 Simple Pleasures

2006-04-19T09:33:00.000-07:00

Inspired by Sunday's sermon to choose the positive outlook and by Carol at "She Lives" http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives I am going to write my 10 simple pleasures.

1. prayer time with Marlene
2. my sleep number bed
3. the new puppy's enthusiasm
4. Christian women's blogs
5. free minutes on the cell phone
6. sugar-free chocolate
7. ice water
8. holding hands with Phil
9. those incredible Arizona sunsets
10. my car

Accentuate The Positive

2006-04-18T08:09:00.000-07:00

At Sunday service pastor talked about negative and positive people and how Satan uses his influence to affect our situations. He talked about the occasional depressed times that everyone on this earth has. Not clinical depression, but just feeling low and blue and seeing the cup as 1/2 full. Negativity is selfish--it involved the "I" word. We become frustrated because of unrealistic goals that we set for ourselves and others. We say that others are not living up to our expectations and that's why things are going bad for us. When we give in and spend time dwelling on being persecuted, unloved, unappreciated and blaming others for our situation we are participating in depraved thinking,

He said that research shows that we all do "self talk" all throughout the day. Studies show that we self-talk at about 400 words a MINUTE! Is our self-talk negative or positive? I know that a lot of my self-talk is negative. I began listening to what I say to myself. I call myself stupid, dummy, dimwit and even worse words--sometimes I say them out loud where Phil can hear me or even when I am alone. I never realized that I even did that until he talked about it on Sunday. These are words that my dad used to say to me. What a blessing Sunday service was.....it made me aware of this. I will replace the negative talk with things like: I am valuable, Jesus died to make me His child. I can do this with the Lord's help.

If we practice being positive, over and over, we will get good at it, just like with anything else that you practice at. We have to train our subconscious to think differently. WE have to work at it. Anything worth having is worth working at. If we want a beautiful flower garden, don't we have to plant, water, fertilize, prune and pull weeds? If we want a delicious dinner, don't we have to make a list, shop, prepare, cook, plate it and serve? How much more important is it to spend time in the Word of God and in prayer with Him? Sometimes retraining our subconscious takes a long time because we have spent a long time putting in the negative stuff--just think of how much negative stuff we see and hear in a day--what about what we watch on television or listen to on the radio. Every bit of info is stored in our subconscious just like on a computer hard drive. I need to delete the negative things and rewrite with positive. I want to retrain my subconscious to automatically think of something positive in each situation. So I will begin to practice, practice, practice!

Lord, Jesus, risen Saviour of my soul, give me a strong desire to fill my life with Your Word so that I can reprogram my mind to the positive. Help me keep my eyes on You.

Part III of the PDL Easter Story

2006-04-15T14:25:00.000-07:00

As I promised, here is the final installment of the story:

That First Easter Morning
by John Fischer of the Purpose Driven Life

(Part III of a three-part series of historical fiction around the events of the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus.)

"The sun rose that first Easter morning on an entirely different world than the one that had existed hours earlier. For most people, to be sure, it was the same. Birds twittered as they usually did in their pre-dawn revelry. Lazy dogs barked at the sound of the first early risers. In his penthouse in downtown Jerusalem, Pilate rolled over in bed and moaned at the mockingbird making a racket on his veranda. He could feel his wife’s stiffness next to him. He didn’t even have to look to see her wide, sleepless eyes locked on a crack in the ceiling for fear of the dreams that might come back if she closed them.

In the nearby barracks, a soldier snored on in thick oblivion. Soon his comrades would wake up to wicked hangovers, a usual Sunday morning experience. Things were always quiet on the Jewish Sabbath, so Saturdays became party time for the Roman soldiers. Out in the courtyard, roosters crowed, and Peter, curled up next to a stone wall, was sure he heard every last one of them. He hadn’t been sleeping, either. All those great plans and dreams for himself and his nation had vanished with three denials and two rooster crows. Roosters had been rattling and cackling in his brain for two nights. They wouldn’t let him sleep, and they wouldn’t let him forget that look on the Savior’s face that left him frozen in his betrayal.

On the edge of town, three women made their way quietly through abandoned narrow streets, clutching vials of sweet-smelling perfume. In the hazy light of early morning, they were headed for Joseph’s garden, where the remains of the man they pinned their hopes on as the Son of God laid without proper respect. There had been no time on Friday to anoint the funeral wrappings, and such activity was forbidden on the Sabbath. Nicodemus and Joseph had done a credible job with limited time and little preparation, but it fell to the women to complete the burial requirements – as much for their own sake as for the sake of the custom.

Just when they started to wonder who might help them move the huge stone over the face of the tomb, they found, lo and behold, that the stone had already been moved away. The soldiers guarding it shifted on the ground in a deep sleep; the wrappings that should have been around the body lay limply on the rocky shelf inside. And an angelic being, bright and glorious, asked a question that would change them and the world forever: “Why do you seek the living among the dead?”

May your Easter celebrations be filled with the same joy and wonder these women experienced on that first Easter morning!"

Praise to the risen Lord, who bought and paid for my salvation! All honor and glory to Jesus Christ the King! I love you, Lord Jesus, my life is yours.

Part II of the Easter Story from PDL

2006-04-14T10:52:00.000-07:00

What Nicodemus saw
By John Fischer of the Purpose Driven Life

(Part II of a three-part series of historical fiction around the events of the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus.)

Better late than never, Nicodemus thought as he waited for Joseph of Arimathea to return from his meeting with Pilate. The sky was black with night, and the torches around the crosses cast long flickering shadows over the hillside. Only the shadows danced. The bodies were still, none stiller than the one in the middle. They had found each other, Joseph and Nicodemus: two wealthy Jews. Too well-connected to risk following Jesus in life, they had finally risen to the occasion now in his death and were prepared to ensure proper care and burial for the body.
Nicodemus had watched the crucifixion the way he followed Jesus for the last three years – from a distance. Now in the darkness, he ventured closer. Suddenly, a tear-stained face filled his vision as if out of nowhere.

“Aren’t you … ?”
“Nicodemus.” He finished it for the man. “I have followed from afar. I wanted to come closer, but I’ve been foolish and afraid. Now I am too late.”
“No, you aren’t. You are here,” said John, newly named son of Mary. “Come.”
John gently took Nicodemus’ arm and guided him closer to the women who were still huddled near the cross. They were in shock, out of touch with everything, even grief. Nicodemus had first resisted John, but once he was in the light and the company of the others, he broke into a thousand pieces inside and started to cry uncontrollably. Suddenly he was touched and held and surrounded by people he did not even know, and they all seemed thankful for a fresh supply of tears.
Nicodemus looked into the faces of people he would have judged hours earlier and wondered at what he saw in their eyes. These were unlearned peasants, but they seemed so much wiser than he. Then he looked at the body of Jesus, and in the lifeless form on the cross he saw himself – a tired old self-righteous man, weary of justifications and the foolish arrogance that kept him from people. He saw the ugliness of his pride and the lies by which he tried to maintain his superiority. He saw it all and hated himself in that moment, and he wept bitterly, alternately abhorring and longing for the touch he was receiving from those around him.

“He spoke of you often,” said John with his arm on Nicodemus’ shoulder. “He said you were one of the few in your position who could see.”
“He did?” Nicodemus raised his wet eyes and wiped them with the sleeve of his robe. “I didn’t know myself ... until just now.”

Up until now, Nicodemus had been dealing with Jesus and the prophets and the nation of Israel and the Gentiles in his mind – each part fitting like clues to a mystery that drew him closer and closer to the cross as if he were following a long shadow toward its source. But now that he was there, right to it, standing right in front of God’s intervention in human history, with all his knowledge and the new revelations he had gained, all he could see was Nicodemus and the sin of Nicodemus. And all he could do was weep, but not the bitter tears of self-pity and remorse he was used to. This was a longed-for release – strangely sweet, cleansing tears, the first blush of forgiveness, in the process of being won by the man on the cross.

Today is the comemmoration of Jesus' death on the cross. Father, let me pause today to remember what that means to me as your child who was purchased at this great price.

The World vs.The Blood Of The Savior

2006-04-13T10:45:00.000-07:00

I've been bothered lately about all the books, "educational channel" programs and news special reports about Jesus and the Bible. The world is doing it's best to prove that Jesus was not God, that events in His life that were written about in the Gospels was a conspiracy, and on and on. I was wondering why non-believers work so hard at disproving what Christians believe.

My pastor spoke about it on Sunday, which put me more at ease with how to deal with non-Christians bringing it up to me and then when I was reading something on the Billy Graham website, it made it clear in my mind why so many worldly people spend so much time trying to disprove the Bible and that Jesus was God and died for our sins.

Dr. Graham says: "To many people the mention of the blood of Christ is distasteful. It grates upon their proud egos to think that such a price had to be paid for their wickedness. A deep revulsion arises within them when we mention the precious blood of Christ and His supreme sacrifice on the cross. To the natural man Jesus' suffering and death are foolishness.

The message of the blood and the Cross and the work of redemption are still foolishness to a people who would like to believe that man can save himself by his own goodness. Modern man is in conflict with the truth of God at this point.

God speaks of a fall and a condemnation, and His key word is grace. Modern man speaks of the soul's native goodness, its aspirations and natural good will. Man's key word is works.God speaks of the depths into which men have fallen and the depravity of the natural man. Man boasts of his nobility, his ideals and his progress. God calls men to believe in Christ or be lost. Man says that it is enough to try to be like Christ. God says that Christ is the Savior of the world. Man says that Christ is just a great example.

We have drifted away from the biblical truth: "Without the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness" (Hebrews 9:22, NIV). God said that as a result of our rebellion and sin, man must die. Jesus Christ became our substitute. He suffered our death on the cross. That blood is essential and indispensable for our salvation. Without its mark upon us, we are unfit to come into the presence of the holy and righteous God."

The full message is at this address: http://www.billygraham.org/DMag_SpiritualHelp_Article.asp?ArticleID=671

Ah Ha! This is why the world works so hard at disproving! Especially at this time of year when Christians comemmorate Christ's death and resurrection. You can't need grace unless you admit you are a sinner. You can't accept salvation unless you are in need of saving.

Lord, Jesus, thank you for salvation and grace.
Yours truly in love,
Cathee

The Most Important Week

2006-04-12T20:39:00.000-07:00

Here we are comemmorating another Easter on Sunday. The week leading up to and Sunday is the most important in my Christian life. Jesus knew what was coming and loved us so much that He didn't run from it. My favorite daily inspiration (besides the Bible) comes via e-mail; a devotional I receive fromt the Purpose Driven Life. I'm going to put it in for the next three days. I hope I'm not stepping on any toes at PDL for doing this:

The most precious drops in the world
by John Fischer
(Part I of a three-part series of historical fiction around the events of the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus.)
"The wounds on his hands bled slowly. Pressure from the weight of his body held back the flow. If there had been no other sounds that afternoon, it probably would have sounded like the slow, steady drip off the eaves of a mountain cabin on a damp, foggy night.
But there were many sounds. Taunts from the soldiers, weeping and wailing from the women near the feet of Jesus, even careless laughter from children playing haphazardly around the perimeter of the crucifixion hill, oblivious to the significance of this particular execution. Small dark puddles would gather briefly under the top beam of the cross, only to be covered by the shuffle of a guard’s feet. And then it would start in again: drip … drip … drip – little droplets seen but not heard.

Mary saw them. She stared at the puddle through her bloodshot eyes while his life flashed before her, and it seemed to her that the earth swallowed His blood as if it had been created for this. As if it were drinking its fill and would thirst no more. Then she slowly turned her eyes up to his face, and her breath failed her. He already had her in the grasp of his eyes. It was the first time He had looked at her from the cross, and suddenly it seemed as if she were falling into a bottomless abyss. She looked until she could bear it no more and turned her eyes away so she could catch her breath again. Once more her gaze went to the small puddle in the dirt, and it seemed now that she, and only she, could hear the droplets landing, loud enough to shut out all other sounds.

She heard His words spoken to her: “Dear woman, here is your son.” And to the disciple he loved, “Here is your mother.”

Soon after that, the dripping stopped, right after the earth shook and Jesus cried out with a voice that nearly shut down Mary’s heart for good. And all was still except for the sucking, sporadic breathing coming from the other two criminals.“This one’s already dead,” said one of the guards. “Can you believe that?” “No need to break his legs, I guess,” said another.

“Well, just to make sure …” One of them approached the dead body of Jesus with his spear, and before Mary could scream out, “No!” he thrust its tip up into the torso of the Son of God just under the ribs. Her scream and the sudden flow of blood and water came out at the same time.
Disgusted, the guard wiped a few drops from his face and walked away, oblivious to the fact that these were drops of blood that could set him free forever."

Lord, Jesus, if I praise you continuously from now until the end of my life, it will never be enough thanks for loving me so much that You were willing to suffer and die the way you did on the cross. I love you, Jesus, with all my heart!

Inspire Me!

2006-04-07T10:41:00.000-07:00

I read several Christian women's blogs each morning as a way to finish up my prayer time. They uplift and inspire me. I'm also reading Billy Graham's new book, "The Journey". I bought it because I feel that I am on a journey here on earth--one that leads to my real home with Jesus.

This morning, I reread Diana's blog, www.dianaway.blogspot.com and was reminded of how the Lord can stop us right in the middle of anything and inspire change--if we are listening for His voice. I want to always be listening!

I read Carol's blog, http://she-lives.typepad.com/she_lives/ and thought about the beauty of aging gracefully. I thought about God's grace and how He wants to bestow His Grace on us. We just have to be receptive. I considered my own aging as I sit here with a back ache from placing concrete pavers in our patio yesterday afternoon. I remember my Grandmother, when she was about 92 and getting senile--she looked in the big mirror in the dining room and said, "Who is that old lady?" My mom told her, "That's you!" And Grandma looked again, and just laughed and said "no that's not me" and did a double take. It took her a moment, after waving to herself in the mirror to realize that was her. I believe that when we leave vanity behind and replace it with God's grace, we can age gracefully and embrace all that the Lord has to offer us in this life.

I read Kelli B's blog, http://kelliburrier.blogspot.com/ and was inspired to write a list of my own. Thanks! Kelli! Am I going to post it here for all the world to see? Hmmmm, let me think on that one. I want to write it out first in long hand and see how big it gets. Then I'll pare it down to really do-able things.

I was reading Veronica's two blogs, http://eventhestarslooklonesome.blogspot.com/ and http://homeiswhereonestartsfrom.blogspot.com/ but she hasn't posted in a while. If you can, read some of her past posts . She is very insightful. I miss her. Sure wish she had an email that I could tell her I miss her postings!

I get daily inspirational emails from The Purpose Driven Life www.purposedrivenlife.com and Joel Osteen www.joelosteen.com Ministries. I usually watch on television and use the website of Joyce Meyer www.joycemeyer.org

I have a full life online, but I need to find a home church. I have yet to find one that feels like home to me. I miss the church that I used to attend in Orange County and I am looking for one like it. Maybe there aren't any in this area. I'll keep looking, though. I am following the Lord's leading in this.

Prayer Does Change Things--mostly me!

2006-04-06T10:24:00.000-07:00

Thank you, God. You do answer prayer. As I've said before, my friend and I pray each morning at the same time, even though we are hundreds of miles apart. Recently, at her suggestion, we changed our prayers from a list of things that we wanted changed(find jobs, our husband's salvation, the sale of my house and our walks with God) to only one prayer: to improve our walk with the Lord.

I have heard it said that one of the benefits of prayer is that it changes you--not that is changes things, but rather my attitude toward things.

That happened today. Not during prayer time, not during quiet time, but when I was writing an e-mail to my friend. The e-mail started with a long complaint about someone I know who had done something that upset me very much. When I thought about what I was writing, I realized that writing that to her would only upset her, so I deleted all of it. Then I was going to complain about my husband(we both tend to complain about our husbands to each other). As I started to type the words, Jesus stepped in and stopped me. I waited and listened. The Lord gave me such an "ah ha" moment that I was blown away. Now to most of you, it might seem just common sense, but within the context of my marriage and the interaction that my spouse and I have always had, it was an incredible insight for me.

Phil is a real easy going guy. He isn't a born leader, he is a follower. I have always been the decisive one in our marriage--bossy and overbearing, you might say. I can argue my point with the best debaters in the world and win the argument. I always said that this setup suited me just fine. Even though the Bible tells women to submit to their husbands, I didn't think that it applied to me, because my husband didn't lead.

I know now that God wants me to submit to my husband and how to do it. I have been waiting on Phil to lead and all he does is sit around, except when there is a drag race coming up, then he's full of energy, which I resent. That resentment comes out of me in angry outbursts, arguing and just a general lack of respect for him when I speak to him. What the Lord showed me today, is that I need wait for the right opening to start a conversation and suggest things to do in a non-nagging way. I know that the Lord will give me that opening. I need to modulate my tone of voice and let go of past frustrations that we have had. When Phil makes a suggestion for an activity, I can agree with him, instead of always stating my opinion(arguing, as he calls it). If I agree with him, what will it hurt? We might put a plant in a different spot or place bricks in a different way--so what? My way isn't always the best way, even though I often thought that!

Phil never says anything against my faith in Jesus or in any way prevents me from prayer time or church activities, so I am blessed in that area of my life. I finally have a clear picture of what God wants from me in submitting to my husband. By uplifting Phil, I can make him a better leader. To uplift him, I need to follow his lead and give him props for taking the lead. If he just wants to sit, I can start an activity without being resentful or nagging him. It will be good for both of us. And our marriage will be the way God intended.

Thank you Lord for the miracle that you gave me today. Give me your strength to hold on to the change you have made in my thinking.

Snap Out Of It!

2006-04-05T07:41:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I soar on wings like the eagles and sometimes I barely hang in there. I need to get perspective on how I let events affect me. With the Lord's help, I can work this out.

I learned yesterday that we are finally receiving a settlement on the robbery that occured in our home last September. We lost about $20,000 worth of items. We are receiving $2,800 in compensation. My biggest personal loss was jewelry that had been handed down to me through the family. My grandmother's engagement ring and another ring that she had given me. Rings given to me on birthdays, necklaces and earrings made by my friend who is a jewelry designer, the ring I had given to Phil when we married and many other pieces that meant a lot to me in terms of memories. The robbers stole my great-grandmother's mantle clock, which didn't work, had been broken and repaired and I saved it from the trash when my uncle who had it was throwing it out. The theives couldn't get any money for it, but I had it in a place of honor in my house and I guess that's why they took it.

I know they are just things, but most of those things had memories attached. (Except my brand new Dell computer). I am very sentimental and have always had trouble getting rid of things that people have given me because I attach pleasant memories to them. For instance, my high school class ring was stolen. My parents didn't have much money at all and it was a hardship for them to get that ring for me. I didn't wear it any longer, and I'm sure it wasn't worth very much money because of being a ring for a Catholic girls high school in Pomona, but it represented my parents love and sacrifice.

I know in the great scheme of my life that jewelry and clocks and computers aren't important. I know that there are people who have lost everything--not just things but homes and livelihoods and even loved ones. My walk with the Lord should be most important thing in my life. I thought I had gotten past the loss of these items, but when I heard from our insurance company last evening, the sadness at the loss opened up again. I guess I am having a little "pity party" this morning. I'm going to snap out of it with prayer and thanks to the Lord for all He has given me that cannot be stolen. I will hang on to the things that are really important: Salvation, faith, grace, hope, joy, peace, patience and love. Close and loving family relationships, a dear husband, wonderful friends, three cute doggies, a nice house and car, a computer and the interenet. What more could I want? I need to divest myself of more things so I have time to appreciate important relationships rather than spending my time with things.

Lord, reveal yourself to me. I am ready to live the life you planned for me! You knew me before I was even born and I trust that You will lead me to victory in this life. In Jesus' name – Amen.

Anger Over Nothing

2006-04-04T07:30:00.000-07:00

When I get angry, I take it out on whomever is available.......my spouse, the bedroom door, a cupboard or whatever is available. It's usually over nothing at all. Or rather, something insignificant: I drop something, knock something over, spill something or stub my toe. It usually has to be a series of small frustrations that build up to the one that causes the anger explosion.

Even though I don't direct my anger toward anyone but myself, it spills over to the whole household. My husband, thinks it must be something that he has done, the dogs cower and run because they think they are in trouble. Immediately, I regret my outburst, but there's no taking it back. It's done. I don't want to do it, but it just explodes out of me.

I want to ask for prayer on this, because even though these outbursts have happened less and less often, I am still having them. I still try to control them by my own strength and will. I want to add this to my prayer list that my friend and I pray about each morning. Will you pray for me? Thank you.

I want my daily life to be a prayer to Jesus and angry outbursts take me away from that. I know that the lesson is to lean on the Lord for my strength in dealing with this. I understand that focusing on little frustrations keep me from thinking about the big issues, which I tend to place on a back burner in my mind. I avoid dealing with the big issue (or issues) and because they are not resolved, I get upset over little things instead.

Lord, give me your strength to take care of the things that I can. Remind me to lean on you for everything, even the little frustrations of daily living.

What Do You Think Christianity Is?

2006-04-01T08:18:00.000-07:00

When Kelli wrote to me today, telling me about some men at her workplace(2 atheists and a non-christian catholic), saying to her, that prayer doesn't work and other comments about, "you christians". It made me think, what do non-christians around us think we believe?

The best way to find out is to ask them, "What do you think a Christian is? What do you think I believe? Once we find that out, we can really tell them what we believe. We need to explain it in words they can understand, not Christian catch-phrases or references to Bible verses(without quoting them) that they wouldn't know about. We need to be clear and concise; it's not an opening for a sermon.

Jesus saved me because I chose to believe in Him and I confessed that I was a sinner and asked for forgiveness. I believe that I am forgiven for my sins and saved into life after death by the blood of Jesus' death on the cross as He interceded for me with the Father. I believe in the Trinity: the Father, Son and Holy Spirit--three persons in one God. I believe that the Son, Jesus became human for the sake of saving all who believed in Him. I believe that the Bible is the word of God and I can learn about Him and how to live my life by reading it. I talk to my Lord through prayer, that the Holy Spirit dwells in me and He can speak for me to God when I have no words to express how I feel. I believe in the grace of God, that I am not perfect(far from it), but I am forgiven. I believe that my prayers are always answered--sometimes in that moment, sometimes later or sometimes the answer is "no" or "wait". And sometimes prayer is way for me to change my attitude about someone or some event. I believe in that Jesus will come again, as He promised for his people, the trumpet will sound and those of us still alive will be caught up into the air to be with Him. I believe that there will be a final spiritual battle on earth for those that are left behind and they will choose God or Satan to be with for eternity. That there will be the Final Judgement and those whose names are not written in the Book of Life will be thrown into the Lake of Fire. I believe that I will see the throne of God live in the Holy City forever.

Amen. Come swiftly, Lord Jesus!

I want to make my daily life a prayer to God, but often get entangled in the world. I have to live here and often I get caught up in the details and lose sight of the big picture. I guess that's why they say, "The devil is in the details", huh? As I've said before, and it says in Ephesians 6 we are in a spiritual battle here on earth. I've chosen my side, have you?

All of My Best Friends Are Sinners

2006-03-28T18:57:00.000-07:00

All of my best friends are sinners
by John Fischer FROM THE DAILY DEVOTIONAL I GET FROM
THE PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE. (This was so well-said I just had to share it!)

"All of my best friends are sinners. I don't mean that I hang out with really bad people. I mean this as a way of looking at everybody, starting with myself.

When Jesus told us to love our neighbor as we love ourselves, it was a way of making us ultimately face into the reality of our own need. How we love others is dependent on how we love ourselves, and self-love has to take into account failure and sin, because we know ourselves better than anybody. We can try to cover up the bad stuff about ourselves, but that only disconnects us from the truth and makes us hypocrites, unable to love because we cannot love ourselves as we truly are.

The only kind of love hypocrites can have is a prejudiced love. Like the Pharisees in Jesus’ day who loved other Pharisees and condemned everyone else, when we are being hypocritical, we can't help but love those who are like us and abhor everyone who is not.
“Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners – of whom I am the worst.” (1 Timothy 1:15) When Paul says this, he puts himself in a position to get next to anyone. You can greet all of humanity with open arms from the perspective of knowing intimately your own sin and failure. “Over there are the sinners of the world for whom Christ died … hey, that's my group!”

A recovering alcoholic is still an alcoholic; he's just recovering from alcohol's influence over him in the company of others willing to do the same thing, so they can all be an encouragement to each other and accountable for their actions. That's the thing that's always been appealing to me about recovery groups. They are all about love and acceptance at the lowest level, and that is what we all need. These people are admitting that they have ruined their lives and are ruining the lives of their loved ones, and they are suddenly among friends who understand everything about that.

When you are trying to believe a lie about yourself, you can only accept those who have committed themselves to perpetuating the lie along with you and are sworn to secrecy about their own hidden sin as a form of mutual self-preservation. But it's all a game and we know it. How refreshing it is to come clean – to bring your life out into the open and be forgiven by God and join the rest of the human race for which Christ died.

Everything and everyone looks different once you have done this. And it doesn't matter if someone else is a Christian or not. Either way that person is still someone for whom Christ died, and therefore someone you can embrace. And why not, since all your best friends are sinners anyway!"

Rejoice in Hope

2006-03-24T07:54:00.000-07:00

Romans 5:1-5
Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ; By whom also we have access by faith in to this grace where we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. And not only so, but we rejoice in trials also; knowing that trials work patience; and patience, experience; and experience, hope. And hope makes us not ashamed; because the love of God is spread in our hearts by the Holy Spirit which is given to us.

I am so thankful to have hope, given to me by my faith in the Lord Jesus. I'm not sure that I have reached the place where I can rejoice in trials, but I can understand them now. I used to think of a trial as kind of a punishment, and I would go thru it complaining and thrashing. By seeking the Lord thru reading His Word, reading other Christian women's blogs, reading several Christian sites and books by Christian authors, such as Billy Graham, I have come to understand that trials are a test of my faith and God only tests those He loves. If I didn't have an opportunity to exercise my faith, how would I ever develop spiritual muscles? And by these trials, God promises patience, which gives me experience and by these experiences, God gives me hope.

So during trials, I can rejoice in hope. That hope dispels fear which is what holds me back from living my fullest life. It gives me freedom to be completely alive in the Lord and experience grace. Things don't happen to me, I am not a victim. I decide.

Wherever I am in my journey here on earth, each day, life offers a variety of paths. At each fork in the road, I decide which path to take. Some decisions are minor, while others are life changing. I can't let life get so hectic that I am preoccupied with only immediate concerns and am unable to step back and see the whole picture. I will stop struggling to have my own way and submit to God's will for my life. My hope is for joy and purpose with even the most ordinary events being part of His plan for my life. I take His hand each morning and ask Him to lead me on the journey.

Lord, I love you and I am so thankful that I can wake up early and spend time with You at the beginning of my day. I want to do Your will and will rejoice in trials as you guide me in Your Ways.

Walking In The Spirit

2006-03-20T15:50:00.000-07:00

I got my daily email from The Purpose Driven Life. I can't believe how good God is. It was exactly about what I struggle with.

“It is not that we think we can do anything of lasting value by ourselves. Our only power and success come from God.” (2 Corinthians 3:5)

John Fisher writes: "I think every Christian struggles at one time or another with this truth. Spiritual growth is a constant struggle between what we do for God versus what we do in God. ......what we do for God by ourselves -- what we do relying on our own resources and our own ingenuity. We may even make it sound good because we are doing it for God, but unless it is of God and from God, it will not be ultimately successful. All great Christian endeavors fall into this trap at some time. We want to control the outcome.

So how do you know if you are dealing in the success of God’s power? You are at risk; you are Johnny on the spot; you are way over your head; you are not completely sure what you are doing; you are acutely aware of your own weaknesses; you have ventured into a place where, if God doesn’t show up, you are a dead duck. Believe it or not, this is what the Bible calls: “walking in the Spirit.” (Don’t you love it?)

Welcome to the adventure. It’s kind of fun, actually. Once you jump in and believe in someone other than yourself and what you can control, you discover a whole new resource."

Controlling the outcome--yep, that's the trap I fall into in all endeavors that are not done in the Lord. I hate to takes risks, am never in over my head, alway want to be sure of what I am doing and play it safe. I have to admit it for what it is. It's not fear as I had previously thought it was; it's pride and lack of surrender to my Heavenly Father. That's why I thrash about, get frustrated and angry and end up being a poor witness. I am praying for the Lord to "take me down", like I would to a dog to get him to submit. This is my adventure with the Lord--releasing control.

Lord, bend me, mold me, break me and control me. Teach me to surrender and submit. I want to walk in Your Ways. I am ready for the adventure.

The New Puppy

2006-03-17T17:18:00.000-07:00

Here's Teddie! I know he looks like he is in jail and that's kind of what it is. I and several dog owner friends who subscribe to this way of thinking. Cage training for puppies. Much less stressful for a new dog in the house. It lets the older dogs (Chickie and Harry) get used to the puppy and also serves to save carpets from puppy accidents. It helps the puppy to learn that outside is the appropriate place to go potty. The cage is big enough (10 times the size of the dog) that if he has an accident, he doesn't have to sit in it. I overslept this morning and there was a wet spot on the floor of the cage which was easily cleaned up.

He is about 16 inches long and about 10 inches at the top of his head. He only weighs a few pounds as he was dehydrated and starving when a guy found him running along a busy street and brought him over to our friend's house. I grabbed the little fellow immediately and when I felt how skinny he was decided to bring him home, whether we decided to keep him or not. He needed to be fed and given water(which we did immediately). When we first brought him home, I thought he might die because he was very lethargic. But now, 3 days later, after many feedings of chicken and rice with puppy formula added in, he is bouncy and mischeivious. His eyes are clear and he is a happy little fellow.

We will visit the vet tomorrow for a checkup and the start of vaccinations. We'll see how old the vet thinks he is and find out what kind of breed she thinks he is. He looks like some kind of toy mix to me. Like toy poodle and maltese or some such. His hair is straight but his face is very poodle-like.

Teddie, Welcome to Parker Pet Heaven (as my friends call our house). We've never had a puppy before. All our dogs have come to us as other people's discards. We take them in, love and care for them and make them part of our family.

Just like Our Lord does. He takes in sinners and makes them His children. I am an heir to the Kingdom of God. I have so much to be grateful for today! Praise you Jesus!

Breaking the Strong Holds of the Past

2006-03-13T08:04:00.000-07:00

As I was getting dressed this morning--Just kidding!

Seriously, though, I have been thinking about my attitude and image of myself. Some days it's pretty good and other days I feel like I look just like this. It's all in my head, it isn't reality. Some days I feel ugly, ungainly, grumpy and negative. Today IS NOT one of those days, but I want to figure out why those negative days happen. Every morning, I wake up earlier than my spouse so that I can have my private prayer and worship time. I want to start the day with my Heavenly Father. I want to put a positive spin on the day. I list what I have to be thankful for. Usually, one thing that goes wrong can screw up the whole day. But yesterday was different........

I listened to Joyce Meyer's Sunday sermon. She talked about breaking the strongholds of the past. She emphasized the word, "Strong Hold" and said that we don't have to perpetuate negativity. We have to be willing to pay the price to break the bad habit (pattern), by facing the truth, dealing with the root of the problem and taking responsibility with NO excuses. I can make the choice to live for myself or to live for the Lord and serve others. Breaking the strongholds of the past required a conscious decision. I said with her, "I refuse to live like this any longer. The past will NOT control my future."

She reminded us also that when we make a decision for God, that is just the time Satan will come against us, to try to defeat our purpose and set us right back to where we were; to take away hope of change and send us back to our negative ways.

But the Lord was with me yesterday. I felt joy and had a positive attitude. Then, something happened. I was putting the clean dishes away, when one of my favorite coffee cups seemed to just fly out of the cupboard onto the counter and shatter in every direction, sending glass as far as the television in the living room. My standard negative response would have been one of anger and negative behavior, griping and complaining as I cleaned up the mess and depressed and upset all day at losing that cup. It could have ruined my day. But I was able to recognize the incident for what it was--Satan's attempt to take away my joy and resolve to live positively. I cleaned up the mess and said to myself, "It was just a thing" and I went on with my day which turned out quite lovely.

Praise you, Lord for another miracle. I am breaking the Strong Holds of the past, one by one, with Your strength. I get it! It's no longer a mystery why my days were so negative. I praise You for revelations and progress!

Structured Prayer Time With My Friend

2006-03-11T08:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my friend and I discussed by email, that we would pray together even though we are separated by many miles. My time zone is not her time zone and she is an hour earlier than I am. She graciously said that she would get up early to pray together with me. We agreed on a list of things that we would pray about. I didn't think I needed to set the alarm, because I always wake up much earlier than my husband and always 1/2 hour before the time we set to pray. I am embarrassed to say, this morning (the 1st morning we are starting our together prayer time) I woke up 10 minutes late. No excuses, although I can think of a few--of course. From now on, the alarm will be set. I was a little late today, but will not be from tomorrow onward.

I am so blessed to have her as my friend. When we struggle, we pray with and for one another, either on the telephone or by email request. Although a lot of years separate our ages, we are kindred spirits. We both love the Lord and struggle with being married to non-believing husbands. We feel things deeply and are opinionated. And we are both saved and washed clean by the blood of Jesus and believe one day we will see Him.

There was a time that my husband was out of town for the second time in two weeks and I was in the 2nd day of the 2nd week and got up that morning feeling sorry for myself. I started crying and having a pity party, thinking of all the lousy things that had happened. I watched a movie that I knew would make me cry more. In the middle of the movie, she called me. That's not a coincidence, that's a miracle from God! She is always coming up with ways that we both can improve our walk with the Lord. She seeks God's face. I pray always in thanks to the Lord that she was my neighbor all those years ago and she had the courage to strike up a conversation with me. I couldn't love her more than if she was my sister/daughter. What a blessing she is in my life, as I hope I am in hers.

The Lord has been blessing me so much that I can hardly contain it within me. This is true JOY, the joy of the Lord. When Keith Green said in his song, "Make my life a prayer to you (Lord)", I finally understand what he meant. I'm not just praying to the Lord during prayer time, but with every minute of the day. My God is not in a box, where I open it up, He is all around me and within me every second, giving me strength and courage, renewing my purpose, carrying my cares, lifting me up, casting out fear. As His Word says in Romans 8:31 "If God is for me, who can be against me?"

Father, Jesus and Holy Spirit, today I give thanks for the miracles you have given me. Help me to become the person you know I can be. When I don't know what to pray for, let the Holy Spirit within me come to you with inexpressible groanings that go beyond human words. I love you Lord, with all my heart!

Our Stories

2006-03-10T08:40:00.000-07:00

We all have our stories; when someone asks about you, you begin by telling your story to explain who you are. My story used to be about my job: "I am an accountant, I do such and such at this place of business......" I would go on about the people I worked with(in a gossipy sort of way) and eventually get around to saying I was married and had dogs. If you went further in depth with me, I would tell you about betrayals and bitterness (all having to do with jobs--either current or past). I defined myself as what work I did. Although I though of myself as a Christian, I rarely spoke about my faith in Jesus. I see now that I was a Pharisee.

My story started changing when we moved to Arizona. I thought I would find a job right away, but although I sent out numerous resumes, I got no calls. My story then became about how I couldn't find a job and the depressed job market. Then as I prayed for a job and to find the Lord's will for my life, He started to change me. He revealed something to me every day about myself. If I look back at past blogs, I can see the progress. I can see how everything works together for God's glory.

My story is changing--NOW! It's going to be about the miracles the Lord gives me every day. It's about salvation and unconditional love from the Lord. It's about loving my husband and wanting salvation for him more than anything. It's about forgiveness and letting go. I am excited about this miracle today!!!! Halleluia.

Where The Mind Goes, The Life Follows

2006-03-07T08:50:00.000-07:00

I have a negative tendency in my thought processes. It comes from being raised in the 1950's when the prevailing idea was anticipate the worst, then you will never be disappointed. Also, don't praise your children when they do what should be expected of them and make sure that they don't get egotistical and proud. The old adage of: "Spare the rod and spoil the child", made whippings a daily occurance. This was how parents (and teachers) guided you in the way you should go. When I fall back to old habits, I operate from a guilt-based thought process. I shouldn't do this or that. I shouldn't eat this or that. Being deprived of doing certain things or eating certain foods only make them more desirable to me as they are the forbidden fruit.

Today, Joyce Meyer talked about how what we think programs our lives. I can reprogram my mind, just as I would reprogram my computer. By reading the Word or any spiritually uplifting book, I can put new spiritual programming into my mind. I can rebuild and renew my mind also by writing and proclaiming from my mouth the positive things that I want in my life. Secularly, these are called "affirmations". I am going to write down positive affirmations and read them each day after I have my morning time with the Lord.

Sometimes, when I try to make positive changes in my life, I overdo it and burn out. I feel overwhelmed with everything I can think of to do to cause myself to change. Today, I read something that will keep me balanced.

On Joyce Meyer's website, she has a monthly magazine and there's an article about studying the Bible. She says: "The Bible never tells us how long to study—it just says to study the Word regularly and we’ll be blessed. I like to compare studying God’s Word to eating. When I sit down to eat a meal, I eat until I’m full. The same thing is true for studying the Word. When I sit down to study, I usually stay in the Word until I have a "full," or satisfied, feeling in my spirit."

Today, with the Lord's strength uplifting me, I will put one foot in front of the other, quit focusing on what's wrong with me and I will be careful with my thoughts--I will stay clear of mind by keeping all thing that cloud up thinking out of my system. Those things are food, alcohol and television--none of which are bad, in moderation.

Lord, Jesus, today I pray for your strength and guidance to secure balance in my life--in my thoughts, actions, words and food intake. Thank you Lord as I know You have already accomplished this and I accept it.

A Real Change In My Perspective

2006-03-06T11:30:00.000-07:00

I receive these "thoughts for the day" each day in my email from the Purpose Driven Life online. This one really created a paradigm shift in my perception of living the Chrisian life and following Jesus. I have always felt that no matter how "holy" and "Christlike" I attempted to live, I constantly fell very short of the mark. I knew that the Lord loved me anyway, but still felt guilty about each secular tv show I watched or book I read or music I listened to. I thought I should spend every minute watching a preacher on tv or listening to one on the radio, listening to only Christian CDs, and I should be reading the bible or a Christian based book. This has been a burden ever since I became a Christian almost 40 years ago. Today, just today, this made me see my life in a different way; I finally get it! I don't have to shift gears into a "worship" mode or a "spirit" mode (that imaginary line spoken of below). I can open my whole life to the Lord. I know that a lot of you figured this out right away, but I am a slow learner. I used to stop doing what I was doing to have a moment of worship and communion with the Lord at several points during the day. Now I comprehend that every minute of every day can be spent with Him.

Welcome to Our World
by John Fischer - Purpose Driven Life

"What God arranges for us to experience at each moment is the holiest thing that could happen to us." This quote is from Jean-Pierre Caussade, an 18th century writer who shows us that sometimes it takes writers and thinkers from other centuries to awaken us to new ways of thinking. Well… new to us, maybe, not to them. Nothing stunts our spiritual growth more than the imaginary line by which we separate holy things from secular things. Or how about the way we make “holy” things holy by removing them from their human context and making them glow with their own special kind of light? That's closer to superstition than it is holiness.

Jesus Christ lived human life on a strictly human level and yet all of it was holy because of who He was. I can't imagine Jesus ever having a purely “secular” moment. So does that mean He walked around with His hands in a praying position all the time, spoke in a low voice, never laughed, and whenever He opened His mouth, scripture came out?

Come now, we all know too much about being human to really believe any of this, but then where do these ideas come from? I think there are lots of answers to this but at least two big ones. 1) We like to keep the sacred far enough away as to be beyond our reach, thus having an excuse for not even trying to be holy. 2) We are too embarrassed about our humanity to imagine Christ ever really sharing in it. Well it's time to welcome Christ into our world. Welcome Him to coffee, to our cell phone conversations, to our chores around the house, to our commute, to the board meeting and the shopping mall -- to the kitchen, the family room, and the bedroom.

We've been trying too long to get into His world with little or no success, which is pretty silly when He already came to our world, lived in flesh like ours and intends to continue living in our flesh today. The Word became flesh and it still is flesh, it's just that the flesh it became here on earth is now yours and mine instead of Christ's. Until we believe this we will never understand what it means to be holy. So let’s set aside all those eyes-rolled-back, flipped-out ideas of holiness, and welcome Christ to our little, seemingly insignificant, dysfunctional lives. That's where He wants to be anyway. And that's precisely where the enemy doesn't want Him to be, because once He is there, we discover, in fact, that we are not insignificant after all. Suddenly all of life is sacred, and we can finally say along with Jean-Pierre Caussade, "What God arranges for us to experience at each moment is the holiest thing that could happen to us."

Praise you, Lord for the incredible revelation You have given me today. I am looking for miracles and You have given them to me. I love you, Jesus with all my heart and I want what You want for my life. Mold me, use me for Your purposes!

Trials, Temptations & Triumph

2006-03-02T17:05:00.000-07:00

I watched Joyce Meyer this morning for the first time. The Lord sent her to me. I got up, turned on the news and it was so depressing, I couldn't stand it. I meant to change the channel down, but instead hit the up button and there she was. Talking about just the things that I have been working on in my life--with God's help and strength. I am paraphrasing some of the things that she said.

Here's her website www.joycemeyer.org

The show was titled, "Tests, Trials, Temptations and Triumph" She hooked me in when she said: "There are no drive thru breakthrus--you gotta go thru it to get thru it." A little later she said, "Submission is not an act, it's an attitude" She told personal stories to illustrate the lesson and it rang true with me. She tells stories with humor but behind the humor is truth. She said this one thing that rang in my heart like Big Ben. She talked about how sometimes we know God could deliver us and even though we pray and pray, He still doesn't. The reason we are not delivered is it is a test of our faith. "

How else can I become strong in the Lord without going through a test, trial or temptation and coming out triumphant? Satan tempts me, God allows temptation to test me. If everything was nice and rosy all the time how would I ever flex my spiritual muscles and grow stronger. If I live sacrificially, I will go thru tests and trials so that I can help others in similar situations. Getting rid of the junk in my life that make me a poor witness to others, like addictions: overeating, cursing & gossiping teaches me about the power and strength of the Lord. But I have to release control over my life and fully embrace God's will for my life. I can cast my cares upon HIm or I can carry them around like a 200 pound gorilla on my back. Thinking about submission has always made me cringe. I didn't want to be in submission to ANYONE! I was no slave. Then the thought of submitting to my non-believing spouse was even more abhorrent. So we had 21 years of strife(the first year doesn't count, as it was the honeymoon phase). I argue with everything he said. I told him and myself that I was just voicing my opinion--everyone has a right to their own opinion, don't they? But it wasn't just an opinion, it was a challenge and the beginning of an argument. Usually, he would back down, knowing that it wasn't that important to be right. But it was very important to me. I NEEDED to be right.

The Lord has revealed so much to me in the past few months about myself. While proclaiming to be a Christian, I rarely behaved in a Christ-like manner. I can see now that I was a Pharisee. I was talking out of both sides of my mouth. I praise the Lord that He did not spit me out, but was patient and waited for me to see the error in my thinking. It's been a difficult journey of self-awareness, watching all my character flaws revealed, one by one. There's probably more, but Jesus is kind, only giving me as much as I can handle at one time.

God is good to me!

2006-02-24T13:59:00.000-07:00

I can't believe someone would put a bulldog in a bikini! I needed a laugh today and this picture always makes me laugh--out loud!

I'm having visitors again, because my husband is at the races and won't be home until Monday. So I managed to talk my mom and son to come for a quick visit. This time, maybe my son and I can go the the Wildlife World Zoo. We never made it last time they were here. Our weather is perfect for a zoo visit, as it's been in the high 70's, even in the low 80's in the daytime. It gets pretty cool at night, sometimes dropping down into the mid-30's, but to me that's good sleeping weather!

When they get here, we are going "to town", driving the 25 miles into Avondale. When I say going to town, I always mean Goodyear and Avondale--never Phoenix. I try to avoid going there as much as possible. It's got worse air quality than Los Angeles and the traffic stinks too. There's no good time of day to drive into Phoenix, but rush hour is horrible. There's always accidents(in my opinion, because truck--even tractor-trailers can drive in any lane and have no restrictions on speed limit). Think of L.A. traffic with a tractor -trailer in the fast lane going 65 to 80 mph. Then come to a screeching halt--where's he gonna go but right over the top of you.

I have no idea why I was talking about traffic, except I took Phil to Chandler to Firebird Raceway yesterday and I was anxious to leave so I would miss the after work traffic. I left the track at 2:30pm and only had a few slow downs. The Phoenix valley has extreme pollution alerts fairly often, because there is nowhere for the bad air to go unless there is a breeze or wind. As soon as the wind lays, the bad air settles in. I am glad that we live "in the sticks" cause we still have clear air. NO RAIN for 130 days. That all the news talks about - it's some kind of record.

Goofy blog today. Not a very spiritual day for me, I guess. More concerned with worldly affairs today. Working on the house. Getting walls spackled where I took all the pictures and fans down. I rearranged the great room a little bit too.

Lord, I love and worship you. I praise you for other Christian women's blogs, like Diana, Veronica and Amy. I pray for spiritual strength to keep moving forward holding on to your strong hand.

Yes, Virginia, There Is A God

2006-02-22T20:40:00.000-07:00

Guess I don't know how to put pictures on this blog. I can do one just fine, but putting 2 didn'y work out so well. The one with the pink is more to the north of us and the other is directly out my kitchen window at the sink. I was going to put several pictures of the sunset that I look at nearly every night out my living room and kitchen windows on this posting, but with the dial-up connection I have, it would take too long to put all of them up. A couple of nights ago, I was preparing dinner and I looked out my kitchen window and saw this sunset. One of the reasons that I got a digital camera was to take some pictures of the spectacular sunsets that we get. I know people say this all the time, but the actual event was even more beautiful. I'd need a better camera and a way bigger space to put the picture to actually give you and idea of how really beautiful this sunset was. Every evening's sunsets are beautiful. It's just that sometimes I miss the sunset altogether. Or sometimes, I get a last glance of a really pretty sunset, just before everything in the sky loses all the color and goes grey.

I love that the Lord shows me the beauty in nature. I am constantly surprized and delighted by the naturally stunning things in nature. How can someone look at that sunset or a flower or a butterfly and most of all, at how wonderously humans are made and not believe that there is a God? I see His Hand all around me. I feel His Spirit in me. I read His Word and He speaks to me as I pray and listen for the Still, Small Voice. I know within me, I am made to worship the Lord and I am incomplete and unfullfilled when I choose otherwise. When I move away from God, I get unhappy, I know something is missing and I try to fill it with something from the world. Anything that I put in that missing space, never fills it. The further away I go from my Heavenly Father, the colder and harder my heart gets. I try to soften it up on my own, and I meet with failure.

Reaching out to Jesus, my Lord and Shepherd and letting Him lead me on His path is the way that my life is serene and fulfilled. I cannot find anything else that makes me feel this way, except to be in communion with my Lord. I know this and pray that I will not forget it--ever.

Here It Comes! Now What?

2006-02-19T17:20:00.000-07:00

You are buried up to your neck in the sand and you don't know how you got like that and here comes the big wave.

Thanks to journalling in this blog and reading other Christian women's blogs, I have had major revelations from the Lord about the way I had gone the wrong direction. I had taken the reins of my life from Him and was busy burying myself up to my neck in my own selfishness. And here comes the big wave of self-pity and feeling of victimization.

How do I get away? Pull my arm out of the sand and reach for the Lord. Long before we moved from the coast of CA to the middle of the desert in AZ, I knew was that I was terribly unhappy. I was unfulfilled in my job and didn't really care to much for my spouse. He didn't like me much at this time either. I had become bossy, nagging, nasty-tempered and unpredictable. If he tried to say anything helpful to me, I got insulted, often bursting into tears. My mental state was in turmoil and I was not sleeping well. I was a mess. I would pray for others but not for myself. Something was wrong with me and even though it was apparent to everyone, I still denied it. I thought that I was the victim of circumstances--but I didn't recognize that I was the one who had set up those events. So, what better time to run away. We sold our house and moved to the desert west of Phoenix.

Once we moved in, the same scenario started all over again. Except, now, I was unable to find work. Here I was stuck at home, in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do. One day, I could not take the way my life was going any longer. I cried out to the Lord that I wanted to die--but really I just wanted O-U-T of the situation. What did I want? I didn't know. I went into the Lord's hands broken and humble(finally). I sincerely admitted that I was prideful, thinking that I could direct my life and my spouse's. I asked the Lord to take control of my life, all of it. By prayer and meditation, little by little the Lord has revealed to me what I need to be doing--not all of it, though. I trust Him each day as I pray to show me the way to go through that day. He led me to reading my neice's blog and from her blog to other Christian women's blogs. He led me to Billy Graham's website and to Annie's Armor of God and to The Purpose Driven Life online. I decided that I must read the Bible every day and it has paid off as the Lord leads me meaningful verses that affect my life. There are daily miracles of revelations, pure joy and serenity.

I'm doing the leg work and the Lord has given me His strength to find self-discipline. I check the paper for jobs, sending out resumes, trusting the Lord will direct me to the perfect job. We are selling our house in the middle of nowhere and moving closer to the big city. In preparation for the sale and move, I have been going through possessions and realizing how much importance I have placed on having things. I have been a packrat and have spent way too much money on collecting things, buying too many things and loading up the house and MY LIFE with things. Part of the stress in my life has to do with things. Getting things, having things, dusting things, finding places to put things and getting rid of old things. The word from the Lord for me today is "simplify". I am going to learn how to sell things (my collections) on E-Bay. I will begin to divest myself of so many "things".

I am excited, Lord, to simplify my life. I pray for your guidance in doing this. And Lord, continue to make this weak and lazy person that I am, into someone supported by Your strength, experience discipline and resolve.

Valentine to the One Who Means the Most

2006-02-14T13:55:00.000-07:00

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY

Valentine's Day is about love, isn't it? I pray for friends and family, God's Love on this day and all days.

When I was a teenager and young adult, I thought love was that feeling that gave me butterflies in my stomach. I couldn't wait to see that person again and there was an ache, almost a pain in separation. When I saw them, my heart would leap, beating fast. I became lightheaded and hypersensitive to every word and expression of my beloved. When those feelings went away, I thought that I had fallen out of love. That person became a non-entity, someone that I couldn't get away from fast enough.

Now I understand that feelings fool us. Love isn't a feeling, it's an action, a choice, a commitment. My feelings can get me into trouble. I most often "feel" love, contentment, serenity, anger, frustration, disappointment, disgust and dislike. My feelings are strong and can pull me up and down like a roller coaster. I can be up on a cloud one minute and down in the pit of despair the next minute. I have learned that the ups and downs are just part of the circus in my head. Feelings and emotions don't get me through life, they complicate it. Love today is a choice to put God's love for me into action. I have not yet learned to love unconditionally, but daily(and even hourly)give up control to the Lord by placing my emotions/feelings in His Hands.

I always had very strong emotions and my feelings would overpower me. Today, with God's help, I understand that I chose to not have self-control(completely different than trying to control others, BTW) over my emotions and developed a bad habit of having outbursts of emotion. I used to say, "Oh well, that's just how I am", but now I see that I was being selfish and lazy when it came to expressing myself. I didn't care how it affected anyone else, I just spewed out whatever passed through my head. In my heart, I was holding a lot of resentment and bitterness for what I perceived had been done to me(the victim). Now, little by little, The Lord is revealing my character flaws to me and giving me a chance to change them through His grace.

My Valentine today is to my Lord and Savior, Redeemer and Gentle Shepherd, Jesus. I love you, Lord and give you all the praise for the changes you are working in my life.

Visitors and Illuminations

2006-02-12T18:08:00.000-07:00

I just love this picture. I scanned the card that my son gave me about 10 years ago on Mother's Day. I like to scan my cards cause that way I can keep them without the paper.

Speaking of mothers, mine has been with me all week. My husband has been gone all week and my aunt Norma, my son, Chris and Mom have been with me since last Monday. It's been really nice and even though we didn't do any of the sightseeing that I had lined up, we still had some very relaxing time together. My Aunt went home yesterday morning.

Mom is the older sister of Norma and they argue all the time. They argue about everything and most of the time they are arguing the same point but from different directions. I got to see how it seems to my husband when I want to argue with him. It is tiresome! The Lord just keeps bringing me miracles. He shows me what I need to work on by illustration in everyday life. I am finally seeing and hearing these things because I have opened myself up to it through prayer(my own prayers and the prayers of others on my behalf--thank you all!)

I am also finally seeing that life doesn't have to be a series of struggles because of my desire to be in control of it. The struggle is taken out of life when I lose my deathgrip on control(or rather the illusion of control). It's a hard habit to break--but that's all it is--a bad habit.

With prayer and the Lord's guidance, I will break this bad habit--I can feel it coming.....Halleluia

It's For Your Own Good

2006-02-09T08:09:00.000-07:00

Don't make me go there!
Sometimes, just because I can't have my way, I grab the door frame and won't go thru a door that the Lord opens for me. It's a control issue, of course! That's the battle I fight every day. I want to be led by the Lord but if I don't like where He is leading, I won't go thru it. Or sometimes, I go thru it, resenting having to do it or kicking and screaming.

I know it's for my own good and I know that it's the way I should go, but instead I choose my own way. The more I practice doing it the Lord's way, the easier it will become for me to follow His lead. The very hardest thing for me to do is to make my husband the head of our house. Today's culture says, "I earn the money, I have a right to say what's done with it". I have a sense of entitlement to direct our marriage. I can see that if I make my spouse the head of the house instead of constantly struggling with him over which way is the right way to do things, that both of our lives would run more smoothly. It is up to me to change my attitude with prayer and supplication to the Lord. Only He can do an attitude adjustment on me. I have tried on my own a zillion times with no success.

Lord, Jesus, today I pray for You to take my attitude about control and adjust it to Your standards. I release the stranglehold I have on controlling situations and people and lay this burden on You. Mold me, Lord.

Here's The Real Issue

2006-02-03T08:35:00.000-07:00

This is funny, but so true! This is just the seatbelt that I need when we are driving. I cannot refrain from telling my husband how to drive. I try to read a book or work crosswords to keep my eyes off the road, but usually I manage to look up and make some comment about his driving. If you've every watched the British comedy called "Keeping Up Appearances", I can be compared with Hyacinth telling Richard, "Watch out for that pedestrian" or "Turn here". It's funny to watch it on television, but not so funny in real life. It annoys me when my husband tells me how to drive or complains about how I drive, but when he is driving, I feel free to comment and warn at any given moment. I am an uneasy passenger in any vehicle, car, bus, train and plane. I have said that I am afraid of flying, but my sister told me that if I was flying the plane, I wouldn't be afraid. It's a more a matter of control rather than fear. She's absolutely right!

Now that I am praying for the Lord to lead me and having a spirit of willingness to be led, it seems that every time I read the bible or an inspirational book, or listen to the Christian radio station, something jumps out at me! I was reading in Genesis, which referenced a verse in Galatians. I turned there to read and saw the thought for the day written by Rebecca Manley Pippert, Titled, "More Myself" "Christianity isn't a narcotic that dulls you into obediance. It involves battle--IT'S EXCRUCIATING TO GIVE UP CONTROL. But that is why we must not feel despair if we are struggling. To struggle does not mean we are incorrigible. It means we are alive!"

This is just what I am working on in my life through the Lord's leading. He gave me this verse in Galatians 5:1--"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." The slavery for me is the desire of control. That affects how I speak to my husband, so doing the battle of my speech pertains also to control.

Thank you Lord for leading me and giving me a spirit of willingness to be led.

The Fruits

2006-01-31T09:59:00.000-07:00

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Gentleness, Faithfulness and Self Control

My niece wrote a comment on my post "The Lord Knows What I Need" that really struck a chord with me. So much so that I copied, printed and put it into the bible that I read every day. I was so worried about controlling my sharp tongue and I thought I was doing it--white knuckle effort on my part, I might say. But when my husband told me that I had been bitchy last week, I saw that thru my own efforts, I am unable to have Self Control. I asked the Lord to help me guard my speech and control my emotions. He gave me what I needed but in a different way than I expected. It came from someone who is 30 years my junior! As Diana wrote to me to notice that Self Control, as a fruit of the Spirit, was last on the list. She said that what is in our heart fires what comes out of our mouth.

It was revealed to me that what was in my heart was not right when it came to my husband(or others, for that matter). I see that pride and self-righteousness still reside in my heart. I wrote on Veronica's blog about televangelists who become impressed with themselves and are humbled by the Lord. Today, I see that I was holding on to a belief that I am better than other people (particularly my spouse) because I am a Christian and I am saved. Most of my life, I have held a high opinion of myself, which got me a long way in my career. Over the last several years, after I was laid off from my job in management, I became bitter. I held resentment in my heart, while smiling on the outside. I hardened my heart to protect it from disappointment as I took a less prestigious job. Bitterness and resentment, two thorns in my heart, festered and were hardening my heart a little more every day. I see how the Lord has been mightly working in my life with the blogs I read and this one that I write.

Just when I think I know everything there is to know about myself, the Lord shows me the deeper layers. He is freeing me from the bonds that I have put on my heart. I am excited to see what the future holds as I take Jesus' hand and walk closer with Him. I am meditating each morning on the fruits of the Spirit and praying for the Lord to remove the thorns from my heart.

Lord, Jesus I give you praise and all the glory for the changes that are happening in my life. Take this old heart like stone and soften it up. Humble me, break me, mold me into a person who lives to do Your will.

Stuck!

2006-01-29T10:41:00.000-07:00

Often I get stuck. I get in a situation and can't see my way out. I rely on my own strength and ability to dig my way out. I get frustrated and angry then take it out on anyone in my path. As I continue to pray for the Lord to work on my attitude, tone of voice and sharp tongue, He directs my daily reading in the Word to verses that are meaningful and enlightening. I can see that I was protecting myself by getting in the first strike. Why would I think that my husband wanted to hurt me and why would I want to hurt him? Why am I not fully trusting the Lord to take care of me?

This has always been a problem for me. Whether it's my pride or just wanting to be in control, I have such a problem with just taking things as they come. I have the illusion that I can control a situation. I say illusion because intellectually, I know that no one is really in control of people, places or things. I usually react to a disappointing or unexpected situation with frustration and anger which is obvious in my voice and words. I want to take it easy but I take it hard. When I was talking to Diana the other day, she reminded me that "if it's difficult, you aren't trusting the Lord".

Each day, I pray to Jesus to guide my thoughts and actions so that I will trust in Him and rely on His Strength to acheive my new goals. I have to report that I felt I had some measure of success last week. Yet, my husband said to me on Friday, "You were sure bitchy this last week." I was shocked and humbled. I felt I had held my tongue, moderated my voice to a kinder tone. I prayed a quick prayer so that I could accept his criticism without defending myself and also without getting insulted or angry.

Don't want to be stuck any more! Lord, I pray today to be bendable to Your Will. Mold me & shape me into the best I can be. I pray to stay open to Your changes in me.

The Lord Knows What I Need

2006-01-25T09:12:00.000-07:00

Yes, He does. Incredible how things turn out. After asking for the guidance of the Holy Spirit, I began with my NIV women's devotional bible to study, beginning in Genesis. The second day, the devotional reading was by Gladys M. Hunt. At the bottom, it lists additional scripture readings. It showed James 1:13-15. By the time I turned to James, I had remembered the starting verse as 19 instead of 15.......so I read:

"Everyone shoud be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires" I continued on to verse 26: "If anyone considers themselves religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on their tongue, they deceive themselves and their religion is worthless."

In a previous post, I had written how my tongue had gotten me into trouble. I have a very sharp tongue and can be downright hurtful, rude and nasty to the people I love. This was something that the Lord laid on my heart and I had begun to pray for. I wanted to be able to speak kindly to my Spouse and Mother, no matter how frustrated I got. It's one thing to admit that I am just like my Dad--my manner of speaking can cut like a knife, and hurt loved ones. I have always used the excuse (in my mind) that I am truthful and that I have the right to state my opinion. In fact, I have come to see that I have escalated from being opinionated to being hurtful. I argued with everything my spouse had to say. I realized after confessing this sin, that it had become a bad habit. I saw that I had become the opposite of what James is writing about. I was angry, frustrated and depressed. I was unable to get control over my emotions and would spew them out at any given moment. It caused bad feelings (even though I would apologize as soon as possible) between my spouse and I. The depression came from the anger turned inward because I was unable to control myself.

I started praying before reading the Word for insight. Each morning now, I read these verses and want to memorize them. With the help of Jesus and the Holy Spirit, I have been able to stop comments from coming out. Slow to speak! When I pause and consider the comment I was about to make, I can see if it is argumentative or inappropriate. The first time I held a comment back, I started to cry from the effort of holding back and as my hubby tried to ask me why I was crying, I only cried more! I realized that I was trying to do it with my own power--the effort seemed overwhelming. With more prayer, the strength of the Lord lifted me up and the next two times I was able to keep silent.

Lord Jesus, my prayer today is that the Holy Spirit who dwells within me, guards my tongue. If I keep my eyes on you, Lord and rely on your strength to control my emotions, I can speak kindly and with love to everyone. All Praise to you Jesus!

Thanks and Praise This Morning

2006-01-23T09:29:00.000-07:00

Moonrise over Mom's Yucca Valley, CA
PSALM 29 V 1-4
Ascribe to the LORD, O mighty ones, ascribe to the LORD glory and strength.
Ascribe to the LORD the glory due his name; worship the LORD in the splendor of his holiness.
The voice of the LORD is over the waters; the God of glory thunders, the LORD thunders over the mighty waters.
The voice of the LORD is powerful; the voice of the LORD is majestic.

As David watched a storm with lightning and thunder, probably over the Mediterranean Sea, he was inspired to write this psalm. Everyday I can find something in nature to marvel at the glory and wonder of God. Before we moved to the desert, I thought of it as a barren place of one color. I have found

I used to long for the green of Oregon and Washington's coastal areas, saying that's where I always would want to live. My husband longed for the warmth and sunshine of the desert. Throughout our whole marriage, I refused to move to the desert. Then...........I got older and all the aches, pains and arthritis came to visit and then live permanently in my body. Living on the coast of California on dry, sunny days, I was fine. But when that "June Gloom" (which sometimes lasted from January to August) set in or when it was raining or foggy, I was in pain. I began to understand why all the "old" people moved to the desert. I knew why there were "snowbirds" who fled to Quartzite, AZ during the winter months. BTW, we do get rain--it's called the monsoon season, which lasts about 6 weeks or so in Sept/Oct. They are some incredible, powerful storms that are amazing to watch from the safety of our home.

I've lived here for 8 months and I love it. I wouldn't live in any other climate. I marvel at the colors of my surroundings and the ability of plants and animals to adapt to the extremes of climate. Last night, it was 27 degrees, today, it will be 70 degrees. The weatherman in Phoenix has commented on how much our area needs rain. We've gone without rain for 95 days. Rain? Phooey! Hey, this is the desert! There is beauty all around. The majestic saguaro cactus, the blooming Palo Verde covered with yellow blossoms, even the greasewood bushes with their tiny, greasy green leaves are beautiful. There are the incredible desert foxes with their gigantic ears, the stealthy coyote who keeps the vermin population to a reasonable number. The cute kangaroo rats(they look like off-white gerbils with a fluff on the end of their long tails). Snakes, you ask? The only one I have ever seen was a red racer(non-venomous) in the road near our house. There are supposed to be a couple types of scorpions, but we have only seen one (non-venomous) when we lifted up our wood step.

God is good to me. He knew what I needed before I knew what I needed. He knew that I would come to love the clear, sunny, dry days. I am one of those people who respond to daylight. I love the long days of spring and summer. All my life, I have dreaded, what I call the long descent into darkness--the short days of winter. A walk out in the sunshine can pep up my day. It uplifts my spirits immensely. I praise the Lord each day for giving me all that I have to be thankful for. Thank you Jesus, my shepherd, for guidance.

The Book of Daniel

2006-01-20T15:27:00.000-07:00

It's a new TV show. I read about it in Time magazine under the title, "Prime Time Religion" Here's the synopsis: "WHEN THINGS GET TOUGH, MANY Christians ask themselves, What would Jesus do? The Rev. Daniel Webster goes straight to the source: the dude with the beard, flowing hair and robe who rides shotgun in his car. "Let it play out," comes the answer from the Son of God. Then he adds, ''You're tailgating'. Daniel (Aidan Quinn), an Episcopal priest in an affluent New York City suburb, has a lot to talk about. His son Jimmy has died of leukemia; son Peter (Christian Campbell) is gay; adopted son Adam (Ivan Shaw) is bedding the teenage daughter of an influential parishioner. Daniel's daughter Grace (Alison Pill) was busted for dealing pot. His mother has Alzheimer's. His boss the bishop (Ellen Burstyn) has been riding him. His brother-in-law has disappeared with $3 million of church money. To take the edge off, Daniel has been turning not only to Jesus (Garret Dillahunt) but also to a stash of Vicodin pills. Father knows best? More like Father has a little helper. Its content-did I forget to mention his sister-in-law's lesbian affair? his wife's martini habit? the adulterous bishops?-has already drawn the ire of the American Family Association (AFA), a conservative cultural watchdog group, which charged that the show "mocks Christianity."

I put up with "Highway To Heaven" and "Touched By an Angel" by never watching. I'm sure that"7th Heaven" must make real pastors cringe. The God who spoke to "Joan of Arcadia" was so non-denominational, it made Him seem ineffectual. Now they are actually portraying Jesus and putting scripted words into Our Lord's mouth! I haven't actually seen the show, but I am incensed that anyone would dare do that. This is a comedy, so they'll be going for laughs! And, yes, we Christians did have "The Passion of the Christ" and sort of with "The Chronicles of Narnia"(an allegory--nothing directly about Jesus). But they've hit us with the "Da Vinci Code", a novel, soon to be a movie, with Tom Hanks. And Ann Rice, popular writer of Vampire and Witch novels, has now written a novel about Jesus' early years.

BEWARE, CHRISTIANS!

I believe the tv show, The Book of Daniel was inspired by Satan. Satan is doing anything these days to pull us away from our Lord. This is the "new" deception. This is insidious and sneaky. I am so enraged by this television show that will reach millions. It's a wolf in sheep's clothing. There are also many "documentaries" these days that are trying to deceive the masses into believing that Jesus is not God, that the Bible is just stories or that God is a mere figment of our imaginations.

Lord help me to keep my eyes on You. Let me kneel at your feet and worship you. You chose me and I choose You. I am your child--let me fill my mind with Your Word instead of what the world presents thru the media.